On the Way to Hitomi's
by Iron Maid
Summary: “Um, Hayatesama, are you alright?” Kasumi asked wearily.Everyone turned to look at Hayate, who for some reason, had his eyes retracted into white circles and his mouth peculiarly formed into an upsidedown triangle. Peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew
1. Hayate's Letter

_This is my first facfic ever!!! Criticize all you want, I'm all ears! (Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or anything else from Dead or Alive, Team Ninja, or Temco. And don't plan to. I'm just an average fan who likes writing stories. So please don't sue.)_

* * *

_Hitomi, it's been a while since the last time we've seen each other and I have to admit, I'm really starting to miss your homemade shrimp tempura. I was wondering if it would be okay if I came over to visit you some time. We can hang out and go places like in the good old days. If that's not what you want, then I understand._

"Now you sound as if you like her." Hayate scolded himself. He crumbled the paper and threw it in the trash bin, which was already filled to the brim with a countless amount unwanted letters. He was frustrated because he couldn't write a simple letter to one of his best friends. Exhausted, he blew out his lamp and threw himself on his tatami. All he could think of was about Hitomi - her and the fun days they spent together. He closed his eyes and slowly dozed off.

_"Woo-hoo!" Hitomi squealed as she dove into the water._ Splash.

_Hayden followed after her, howling like a monkey. "Cannonball!" he screamed. _Kerr-plunk!

_The two friends popped out of the water, laughing and wrestling each other, until Hitomi broke away. "Common Hayate!" She screamed. "Don't be such a big baby!" "Jump in!"_

_"Yah, Hayate, jump in!" Hayden encouraged._

_Hayate cautiously came out from behind the bushes._

_Hayden gave out a whistle. "Sexy!" He shouted. "You look great in my speedo!"_

_Hitomi began laughing. Her face was scarlet._

Hayate opened his eyes. It was already morning. Kasumi and Ayane were already awake and were laughing from the other room.

"Really!" Kasumi bellowed. "That's mean!"

He slid open the screen and walked down the hall. His head was pounding from last night.

"And then I said, 'Hey you!' and then he looked at me as if I were crazy and then I said, 'Yeah you! Either move it or lose it, buster!' And he ran! Oh man, you really should have seen his face! He looked so sca-"

"Good morning Hayate-san!" Kasumi cried, cutting off Ayane. They were in their colorful flower Kimonos.

"Morning Kas, Ayane." replied Hayate as he walked by. He sniffed at a pot of mush placed over a low fire in the cooking area and scowled. "Who made this?"

"Oh! I did! You like?" said Kasumi, excitedly.

"Uh, smells terrific."

"Really?! It's Crème de la Crème de la Kasumi, my very own recipe. No one helped me this time."

Ayane snorted and rolled her eyes.

Kasumi jumped up and went to scoop a spoonful of it into a plate that was already on the table. She was smiling as she was doing so. "One Kasumi Specialty for ni-san! Here you go! Eat up!"

Hayate looked down at his plate. What was supposed to be Cream of Wheat, appeared to be a gooey mesh of rice and corn. "I, I think I have to do something first." Hayate stammered.

Kasumi frowned. "What do you have to do?"

"Yeah Hayate, what do you have to do?" Ayane teased, knowing that if Kasumi ever found out that no one, especially Hayate, didn't like her food or anything else relating to her, she would turn into a human water pipe.

Hayate gave Ayane a dirty look. Kasumi crying was the last thing on his mind. He scrambled around as fast as he could to find out what to say. "Uh…"

"He's probably in love." Ayane clasped her hands together and fluttered her eyes.

Kasumi giggled, slightly amused by her remark.

Hayate blushed. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm not stupid, Hayate. I know you like her."

Kasumi became uneasy and leaned forward, wondering whom the lucky girl was.

"Who? Hitomi? We're just friends!"

"Oh yeah? What about the letter?"

"What letter? Did you look through my trash again?"

Ayane crossed her arms and looked away.

Kasumi shifted glances from one to the other.

"Look, I'm just going to visit her."

"And all the way to Germany?"

"Germany!" Kasumi's face brightened. "Wah! I want to come too ni-san! Can I come too?"

Hayate tuned towards his sister and nodded. "But, only until she responds to my letter, I didn't get to finish it yet."

"You don't need a letter ni-san. Give her a surprise visit! Everyone loves surprises!"

Hayate laughed. "Alright." he said.

"Oh - my - gawd! You've gotta be kidding me! You guys aren't serious, are you? I sure as hell am not going to visit that obnoxious butch!"

Hayate was insulted. "Fine then. It's official. Kas, pack your bags were going to Germany."

"Wah!" Kasumi yelped, jumping in joy.

"I'll go and book us a flight."

Ayane's jaw dropped. All of a sudden, she regretted ever telling him she didn't want to go. She could already picture Kasumi, Hayate, and Hitomi having fun - without her! Ayane, trying to hide her emotions, rolled eyes and looked away.

* * *

"So, are we all ready?" Hayate asked Kasumi as he picked up his bags.

"Wait! Ayane yelled as she came running down the stairs carrying a lavender purse and backpack. Kasumi squealed in delight, happy to see her coming. She had the same purse and backpack, except it was pink.

"I thought you didn't want to come?" asked Hayate.

"I changed my mind. I uh… managed to get myself a spot on the same plane."

Hayate smiled. " Well, I'm glad you decided to come."

Ayane blushed.

"Look Ayane," Kasumi stated as she pointed at each other's bags, "we look like twins."

"Yah, yah." she muttered.

"Are we ready to go then?" Hayate asked.

Kasumi began to ponder. "Um, um, um… Oh yes, I told everyone where we were going and they said they wanted to come too! So I told them to come as soon as possible and I think they're all really excited!"

"You what?!" Ayane and Hayate hollered in unison. Kasumi shrank back.

"Well I, I thought that maybe, if…" _sniff "_ Wah! Are you going to be mad at me?"

Ayane rolled her eyes. "Really, Kasumi, you could be such a dunce at times."

Hayate closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Forget it, it's alright. I think Hitomi would be glad to see them anyways."

"You think?" Kasumi asked.

"But…" Ayane interrupted.

"Anyways everyone loves surprises right?"

Kasumi wiped her eyes and smiled. Ayane fumed. She could never understand how Hayate could take Kasumi off the hook that easily.

_'Honk, honk… Honk…!'_ Blew a horn from outside.****

Kasumi gasped and widened her eyes. "Our taxi's here!"

"Do we have everything?" Hayate asked.

The girls nodded.

"Okay, let's go."


	2. Many Meetings 1

_Thanks for your reviews guys! I hope you'll like the new chapter! (Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or anything else from Dead or Alive, Team Ninja, or Temco. I'm just an ordinary fan who likes writing stories. So please don't sue.)_

* * *

Hayabusa saw Hayate standing outside the food court holding a taco in one hand, and a cup of Horchata in the other. His mouth was full and covered in crumbs. "Hayate!" he called out. Hayate saw him and choked on his taco. "Hayabusa!" he answered back, sputtering out pieces of his food. They hugged each other fondly, and began to talk as if they were long lost brothers, laughing at the slightest things. At the same time, Kasumi and Ayane came walking out of Don Juan's Macho Taqueria.

"Hey, it's Hayabusa," said Ayane.

"Eeeek!" Kasumi shrieked as she stopped dead in her tracks. "Where?" I did not brush my hair yet! Go to the restroom with me?"

"What are you talking about? It's not as if he were the Pope or something! C'mon, let's go see him." Ayane grabbed Kasumi's by the arm and pulled her forward. As they drew closer, Ayane let go, and ran towards Hayabusa.

"Ryu!" she said as she waved her hand.

Hayabusa turned his head. "Ayane!" He said as she hugged him, "You grew."

She blushed. "Just little."

"Oh, I just remembered. I got something for you." He pulled out a shiny, gemmed bracelet, decorated with butterflies.

"Is it…?" Her eyes began to sparkle. "Is that for me?"

"It's your birthstone. I hope you like it."

"Like it? I love it!" She put on the bracelet and stuck out her wrist. "What do you think?"

"Looks good."

"I don't usually wear jewelry, but I really like this one. And those butterflies are so cute. I love them!"

Ayane's voice drowned out from his head. Something had caught him in the corner of his eye. It was dressed in white overalls, with a striped shirt, and fine, long, ginger hair. "Kasumi…" He whispered. She was standing about ten feet away from them, feeling around for her hair. She was looking downwards.

Ayane snapped her fingers. "Hello! Are you even listening to me? Gawd! You're so rude!"

"Kasumi," asked Hayate. Kasumi put her arm down and looked up.

"Yes?" she asked sweetly.

"Aren't you going to say hi to Hayabusa?"

"Oh," said Kasumi as she walked closer. "Hi." She gave him a weak smile and quickly looked down again.

"Hi," Hayabusa replied, returning the smile.

"No!" someone screamed from a distance.

They turned their heads towards a shapely, blonde woman strutting her stuff as if she owned the place. She had her nose in the air and was followed by a man carrying tons of her designer luggages. The man apparently had green hair. His eyes were covered behind a pair of dark sunglasses and he was wearing only flame-patterned shorts with a big ugly belt saying "Great!"

"Hey isn't that Tina… and Zack?" asked Ayane.

"No, no, no, no, no, no! For the last time, Zack, we are not on a date!"

"C'mon, baby! I thought you loved me?"

"Hah! Like that will ever happen. You're lucky I even let you carry my bags!"

"What's in'em anyways? They're so heavy…Woah!" Zack lost grip on one of the handbags, making the rest topple down with it. Passerbys began looking at the commotion.

"That's great Zack! At this rate we will never make it out of the airport alive!" Tina spotted the ninjas staring at her from a distance. "Hey you guys!" She shouted, "I've missed you so much!" Tina sprinted towards them, pushing people aside and leaving Zack behind with all the luggage.

Ayane and Kasumi opened their arms to receive a hug, but she brushed past them and instead gave Hayate and Hayabusa one. It wasn't long until she got them into a deep conversation to a point where they were laughing every second. Meanwhile Kasumi and Ayane were gritting their teeth. Steam surfaced from the top of their heads.

"She is so fake." Ayane muttered to her sister. Kasumi clenched her fist.

"That's cool! So how's business down at the curio shop?" Tina asked Hayabusa.

"Good, good. You should stop buy some time. I have some things you might like."

"Of course! What are friends for? Oh yeah! I forgot to mention! I've starred in a movie called The Last Battalion. I think its coming out this June."

"Really?" Hayate asked. "Is it any good?"

"Oh my God! It's so cool! You have to see it! I had so much fun doing it. But it's hard work you know? That's why I need this break." Tina looked around and spotted Ayane and Kasumi. "Hey, you two! I didn't know you guys were here!"

They fell.


	3. A Few Mishaps

_Thanks for the review, hope you guys will like this chapter too. (Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or anything else from Dead or Alive, Team Ninja, or Temco. And I never plan to.) Oh and Dark Samarian, I'm reading your story right now, and I'm liking it._

* * *

Helena stared at herself in the mirror. She was horrified with what she saw. There was a humongous boil (with pus and everything), hanging from the side of her nose; and it was just about ready to pop. But Helena didn't know how to pop boils, so she tried smashing it in with her finger. But when she did… _Smash_……… It became bigger. She clasped her hand over her mouth to stop herself from screaming. Apparently Helena never had a boil in her life. She closed her eyes and thought about what a little boy had said to his mother when she was in line to tag her luggage. At first she thought he was very cute, but he turned out to be a real monster when he saw 'The Boil.'

"Mommy," he yelled as he tugged his mother's coat and pointed at her. "Look at the lady mommy! Look at her big wart! She's a 'witch!'" ("Witch… The word rang in her ears.) His mother, who tried in vain to hush him down, couldn't help but laugh at her son's constant, but true connotations. He just kept going on and on and on…

Worse, when she was in the plane, she caught the person she was sitting next to staring straight into her face. He didn't look a bit abashed. "Wow…" he said in great interest, leaning towards her as she leaned back, " that's pretty big. Can I pop it for you? You know, I'm really good at that. Popping."

"…..……." Helena tried to keep a straight face.

"Pop!" he yelled, suddenly.

Helena jumped. The people, across the isle, began laughing. Then the flight attendant came passing by and dropped a whole pan of peanuts, when Helena turned to face her. It was pure embarrassment.

Women began piling into the restroom. Helena cautiously exited and hid herself behind a pair of sunglasses and a headscarf. "Did you see that?" said a woman to another.

"Yes."

"Wasn't it-"

"Shhh… She'll hear you!"

* * *

Lei Fang waited behind the line of people waiting to board off the plain from China. She had flew in first class, so it wasn't very long till she got off the plane. "Goodbye China, hello Germany!" She told herself. "I can't wait to go shopping!" Lei Fang stood by the luggage rack to retrieve her belongings. Just as she reached out to get them, someone grabbed it and walked away. Lei Fang, who was insulted by this, followed him and snatched the bag from his hands.

"Not to be rude sir, but this happens to _my_ bag. See, loo…" Lei Fang looked down at the tag. Her heart skipped a beat. Written on the tag was not her name, but the name of the man. Jan Lee.

"Ahem…" He reached back for his bag. Switch

"Jan Lee! What a surprise!" she said as he took it. She had no idea what to say. She was embarrassed, uncomfortable, and nervous within Jan Lee's presence. So she blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "What are you doing here?"

"Same reason you're here - to visit a friend, unles-"

"Who? A girl? Is she pretty?" She asked without thinking. It took her a second to remember that all of them were going to meet at Germany to visit Hitomi.

Jan Lee looked at her as if she were crazy. "Well I don't know how you like to refer Hitomi as, but yeah, I'm pretty sure she's a girl."

"I was just kidding! Like I don't know Hitomi's a girl…" Lei Fang tried to laugh, but it sounded horribly fake, and Jan Lee just seemed to get more annoyed. "Umm… Oh, there's my bag." She waited for it to come closer and bent over to pick it up.

……………

"Isn't it ironic," said Lei Fang, breaking the silence, "how we both have the same bags? I mean… She turned around, but Jan Lee was nowhere in sight. "Ugh!" she said to herself. "Stupid Jan Lee."


	4. Snooping Around

_I'm going to be gone for the next three weeks, so I'm turning in more chapters than usual... I hope you guys will like them. (Disclaimer: I don't own anthing from Dead or Alive, Team Ninja, or Temco.)_

* * *

Jan Lee had spotted Zack through the crowd. He was trying to pick up seven pieces of luggage from the floor all at the same time. But every time he managed to do so, one or two of them would fall, and he'd drop the whole thing and pick them up all over again. "That idiot," Jan Lee said to himself. "He should have got a cart for all those bags." "Hey Zack!" He yelled. "Zack, do you need a hand?!"

Zack turned around, happy to see him. "Jan Lee! How's it hanging?"

"Hey."

" I need your help… I can't find Tina."

"Tina's here?"

"Yeah, she lost me in the crowd."

"You mean ditched you."

"Right."

Jan Lee sighed. "I just saw Lei Fang a while ago too."

"You did?"

He nodded. "She was waiting by the pick-up to get her luggage."

"Speaking of luggage, take some of this stuff."

"Sure, sure." Jan Lee picked up three bags, each one of them very heavy. "Damn, what does she have in here?"

"I dunno, beats me."

"Dead bodies probably."

"…Or Bass."

Both of them began laughing. "Hey, hey you wanna look?" asked an excited Jan Lee.

"I have no problem with that!" said an eager Zack. He knelt down and quickly unzipped one of the many handbags. The first thing he pulled out was a red, lacy push-up bra. Zack began to drool. "Whoa, baby! That's what I'm talking about!"

"Holy crap that's big! What's the size on that thing?"

"Hold on, let me check… It says, DDD."

"WTF! Is that even a size!"

"That's what it says."

"Is that whole bag full of that stuff?"

"You bet!"

"Make some room for me, will you!" Jan Lee dropped down next to Zack and started searching through the bag. He drooled over a pair of black see through lingerie. "Man, I'd make sure my woman wore this for me every night."

"Shoot, just give two fine women with big tits and a bouncy bootie and I'll be a non-stop love machine!"

Jan Lee rolled his eyes. "What are the chances they'd pick a guy like you?"

"Are you crazy? I'm the best damn looking guy in this whole airport! Ask any woman if she thinks I'm sexy, and I bet you she'll say 'yeah'!"

"You're just desperate, that's all."

"Alright, alright." He looked around. "See that lady coming over? I'll ask her and you'll see what I mean." He waited till the woman was near them. "Hey, lady! You think I'm sexy, right?" The woman smiled as she passed by, but her expression looked as if she was laughing at him. "Yeah? Yeah?" he asked while nodding. "Ahah!" he chuckled. "Did you see that? Did you see that? She had a thing for me, I know it!"

"That woman thought you were a joke, you idiot."

"Don't be hatin just cause you can't get some."

"Man, I'm not going to even get into this argument with you!"

"That's right. Cause you can't hang! Might as well kiss my ass right now."

Jan Lee rolled his eyes.

They continued looking through the bag.

"Well, well, well." Someone's voice said from behind them. "I should have known you two were perverts." Both men turned around to see a woman with a hideous wart, wearing a headscarf and dark tinted glasses.

"Stay away, you old hag! These are my girlfriend's underwear – she lets me look!"

"Oh, really? Like I'm supposed to believe that! What's her name?"

"Tina."

The woman laughed. "Dare to dream?" She took off her glasses.

"Helena?" Jan Lee asked. "Is that you?"

"Of course it is. Who do you expect?"

Zack stood up. "What's with that ugly wart?"

Helena covered it over with her hand. "It's not a wart… It's a boil."

The two shivered. "Same difference," said Jan Lee.

"Does it really make me look that bad?"

Jan Lee laughed. "Well, I don't know… for an old hag there'd really be no difference if you were with or without one…"

The both of them laughed together and gave themselves a high-five.

Helena flared. "Oh, shut up, you two! And do grow up!"

"Ok… Don't need to get all warted - I mean, worked up about it…" said Jan Lee with a grin.

"How could you expect me not to get worked up after laughing at me and calling me hideous?"

"We weren't laughing _at_ you, we were laughing _with_ you!" replied Zack.

"Do you think I'm stupid?"

"What? I never said that!"

"Maybe not, but you were implying it!"

"No I wasn't!" Zack looked at Jan Lee. "Help me out here! She's _boiling_ up!"  
Helena widened her eyes. Jan Lee, seeing her rage, tried to break it up.

"Helena, you aren't stupid and you aren't ugly."

"Yeah! We were just kidding around!" Zack added.

"Guys always say stuff like that, but we never really mean it." A shiver suddenly ran down Jan Lee's spine.

"OMG! Helena, you're here too?"

Helena turned around. "Lei Fang!"

Lei Fang ran and gave her a hug. "Mmmmm…"

They began talking feverishly until Lei Fang noticed the wart on Helena's face. She gasped. "You have a big wart on the side of your nose!"

"I know! I know!" She covered it. "It just appeared out of nowhere, and I can't get rid of it! Rrgghh!"

"Don't worry! I have this cream you can use. It's really good at covering blemishes. I use it all the time."

"Oh? Merci! You are such a life saver!" She jumped up and hugged her.

Lei Fang dug through her purse. "Tada! Here you go! Just apply a little bit every five hours or so using your ring finger. You apply less pressure to your face that way."

"…Did I get it right?"

"You got it! I don't see it anymore!"

"Really?"

"I'm totally being serious."

"I need to buy something like this more often, just in case another emergency happens."

Jan Lee rolled his eyes and leaned over to Zack. "Girl talk, so typical of them – they take forever."

"Do something, then."

"I'm thirsty," said Jan Lee, trying to interrupt them. "Let's get something to drink."


	5. Many Meetings 2

_(Disclaimer: I don't own anything from Dead or Alive, Team Ninja, or Temco.)_

* * *

_"_Say, why don't we all stop over by the Starbucks?" Tina suggested.

"There's a Starbucks here?" Ayane asked.

"Yeah! I passed by it somewhere…" She looked around. "All the way… over… there!" She pointed.

"Oh I'd just love a Vanilla Fraupuccino right about now!" Kasumi whined. "C'mon Hayate! Let's go!" She clinged to his arm and dragged him forward.

Ayane was just as thrilled; she as well craved for a Java Chip. She planned on grabbing Hayabusa's arm and tug on him like what Kasumi did to Hayate, but she was too late. Tina put her arms around him first.

"Ahhh, shoot!" Ayane cursed as she swung her arm. "Alone again." She walked ahead of everyone, trying to look excited so she didn't appear awkward walking next to people that were all over each other.

Hayate felt bad for Ayane, and hooked his arm around hers when he and Kasumi caught up. "Phew!" Ayane thought to herself.

"Wah! This is like the Wizard of Oz!" Kasumi squealed as she began to skip. Ayane followed, too blinded by relief to realize that this was usually against her nature. Hayate, on the other hand, felt a sudden volt of stupidity and regretted ever joining Kasumi and Ayane. They pulled him forward and forced him to sing.

"Weeere off to see the wizard! The wonderful wizard of Oz! We're off! We're off! We're off! We're off to see the wonderful wizard of Oz!"

Hayabusa and Tina were laughing from behind.

"They look so cute together!" Said Tina. "Makes me want a sister…"

"Yeah… They really are something." Hayabusa locked his eye on Kasumi.

Tina caught him staring and nudged him on the arm. "You like her, huh?" She had a big grin on her face.

"No… she's not my type. She's too young for me anyways."

"Age doesn't matter! My uncle, he married my aunt, and they were, like, only twenty years apar-" Tina widened her eyes. "Oh my God! That _is _gross!"

"Look, I don't like her, okay?"

"Gosh, just asking…"

Silence.

"I mean, haven't you ever had at least any chemistry with a girl before?" asked Tina, out of curiosity. "No, huh?"

Hayabusa was quiet for a while.

"Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh?" She questioned constantly while trying to hold herself from laughter.

"Well, there was this one girl I know… I met her about two years ago during one of my missions." Tina listened attentively.

"Really? Did you guys… You know… Do anything?"

"I couldn't."

"And why not?"

"You wouldn't understand. The circumstance I was put in – I had to finish the mission."

"How about afterwards then?"

"I think she had a thing for me, but I turned her down."

"You what?!! You turned her down? Why? Was she hot?"

"Now that I think of it… yes, she was. She sort of looked like-" He paused. "You…"

Tina blushed.

"But better. No-" he corrected himself. "Way better." He began gesturing with great exaggeration. "She had these really big blue eyes… and these full… red lips… with long… golden hair. Just like a goddess…"

"Ok, Hayabusa, I get it!"

He ignored her and continued explaining.

"And you should've seen what she was wearing. She was a very voluptuous woman…"

Tina turned into a darker shade of red.

"I think her chest is bigger than your-"

"I don't want to hear this anymore! God! If she's so better than me, why don't you just replace me with her instead?!"

Hayabusa thought about what she had said laughed to himself. "I was just playing! You're not _that_ ugly!"

"Gee, thanks!" She retorted sarcastically. She quickened her pace.

"I'm sorry!" He yelled. He caught up and stopped her. "Here, you can sock me if you want to." He bared his one of his arms.

Tina leaned on her right leg and placed her hands on her hips. She sighed. "You know, for a second there, I wanted to hurt you so bad, but then I said to myself, 'No, Tina, you're way too nice to do that.'"

Hayabusa laughed. "I got you. Still friends?"

She smiled. "Friends."

They continued walking.

"Ryu… what was her name again?"

"Rachel."

"Oh, Rachel huh?"

* * *

Coincidentally, Hayate, Kasumi, Ayane, Hayabusa, and Tina met Lei Fang, Jan Lee, Zack, and Helena at Starbucks. They got together, ordered their favorite drinks, and grabbed two booths nearest to each other. They were all having a blast, laughing and catching up on the good old days. "Well I guess every one is here." Hayate told himself as he observed everyone.

"Hey," Jan Lee mentioned. "Remember that time when Bass got really drunk at Tijuana and ended up on a Girls Gone Wild video?"

Everyone burst out laughing.

Tina sighed. "It was _so_ embarrassing, my dad is such an idiot!"

"How about the time when Ayane and Kasumi were talking to each other, in their sleep?" added Lei Fang

"How is that even possible?" asked Jan Lee.

"Oh yeah!" Tina laughed. "They were talking about rubber bands!"

"I don't remember that!" whined Kasumi.

"That's because we were asleep, doofus!"

Zack butted in. "Oh, oh, remember, remember when we found tons of porn in Gen Fu's closet? And Jan Lee was all like, 'Lets look at it! Let's look at it!' but no one wanted to look at it, so he looked at it by himself and when he came out he had this big'ol boner that lasted for ten minutes?"

The room grew uncomfortably quiet.

Lei Fang pondered for a second. "So that's why you were always turning the other way…"

"Aw, don't believe him! He's lying!" said Jan Lee, trying to defend himself.

"Shoot, I was there when you came out of the room! Even ask Hayabusa! He was there!" Everyone turned to Hayabusa.

"What?"

"You saw it, right?" Zack asked.

"Saw what?"

"Jan Lee's boner."

"I uhh… I don't know…" He answered a bit uncomfortable. He didn't want to embarrass Jan Lee.

"You've got to have seen it! It's the first thing you would have seen if you looked at him!"

"Give it up, already, Zack. You were just imagining it!" said Jan Lee.

"Hell no! I saw it with my own two eyes! It was so big you could've killed someone with it!"

All of the girls turned slight pink, except for Lei Fang, who was more of a hot pink. She fanned herself. "Whooh! Is it just me, or did it get hotter in here?"

"Man, Jan Lee," Ayane said, surprised. "I guess…"

"Don't believe him, Ayane! Sure, its big, I admit that, but it can't kill some-"

"Don't you think we had enough time conversing over how big Jan Lee's penis is?!!" Helena intruded. Once again, the room was quiet.

"Ahem." Hayate coughed. "What did you guys get?"

"Java Chip-"

"Vanilla Fraupuccino-"

Ayane and Kasumi answered at the same time. They glared at each other. Ayane turned away.

"But which one do _you_ like better, Hayate?" She handed him her drink so he could taste it. Kasumi did the same.

"Both are good. I like both."

"Mine has more attitude to it." Ayane said.

"Mine is nice and sweet. I just know you love it!"

Hayate was uncomfortable for some strange reason, and all he was comparing were two fraupuccinos.

"Well, I'd prefer the Vanilla Fraupuccino, if I had to choose." Helena said, trying to break up the sibling rivalry.

"Are you kidding?" Tina joined in. She turned to Kasumi. "Java Chip is way better! Have you ever tried one?"

"Umm, no…"

"Oh, you've got to try it!" She said with a moan. She handed Kasumi her Java Chip to give her a taste. Kasumi took a sip.

"You like it? Isn't it one of those things that feel really great in your mouth? The texture is just so… ugh! Incredible!"

Jan Lee snorted. "I'm sure it is."

Tina's nostrils flared. "Jan Lee, get your head out of the gutter!"

"Hey, you made it come out the wrong way."

"Apparently, I'm not the perverted one here, _Bone_ Daddy!"

"Oooh!" Zack laughed. "She got you there!"

"Shut up, Zack." Jan Lee muttered. "Believe me, you guys. I didn't get an erection."

Zack continued laughing.

"Whatever, Jan Lee. No one believes you," said Tina.

Jan Lee hung his head in shame.

"There, there," Helena said, slightly amused. She patted him on the back. "Sometimes, you just have to accept the embarrassment."

"You don't have to rub it in… old hag…"

"Don't make me hurt you."


	6. In the Girls' Room

_(Discaimer: I don't own anything from Dead or Alive, Team Ninja, or Temco.)_

* * *

Helena looked up at the building. "We're going to stay in here?"

"Just for the night. It's really late right now. What's wrong with it?" Hayate asked.

"I don't know… As long as the rooms are big, I'll be happy."

"Helena, I can't pay for a suite."

"Who said you're paying?"

Hayate's cheeks flushed. He was embarrassed, especially because a woman was going to pay for him.

"Don't worry. The suite is on me."

"A suite?" He asked. He was surprised. He had never been in a suite before. "Are you being serious?"

"You're acting like you've never been in one before."

"Actually, I haven't… I'll be happy to pay for half of it at least, if you don't mind."

"Thank you, for the consideration, but I have plenty of cash."

"No, I insist." He grabbed his wallet out, but Helena pushed it down. "Please. Save it for you and your sisters."

He thought about Kasumi and Ayane and how he wanted to give them a good time. "Okay… It's up to you."

Helena went inside and checked in for 2 neighboring suites.

* * *

The group of nine walked through the fancy marbled halls of the hotel on the last story. The sound of their shoes hitting against the floor echoed off the walls. Everything in there made everyone, except Helena, feel inferior.

"Wah… I don't feel like I belong in a place like this. It's so nice in here!" Kasumi wailed.

"It's easy getting used to." Replied Helena.

"Tch, easy for you to say." Ayane mumbled to herself.

Zack caught his reflection on the marble tiles and slicked back his hair. "Damn, I look good!" He told himself.

"Okay gentlemen," said Helena as she handed Hayate the key, "here's the key to your room."

"You mean, we're separating?" Zack asked.

"Of course." Said Tina. "To keep losers like _you_ away from us."

"There are young ladies with us here, so if you don't mind, we are going into our room."

Ayane wrinkled her nose. 'What? As if I can't take care of myself!' she thought.

"By the way, all your guys' luggage is already inside the room." Helena informed them. She and the other girls went in.

"Oh my gawd! This place is heaven!" Lei Fang cried as she threw herself on the couch. "This place even has a kitche ! Someone can actually live in here."

The girls curiously went around, exploring the two-bedroom suite.

"Oh, look at the bathroom!" exclaimed Tina. "There is a vanity mirror in here and everything! And look at the tub! It's so big! It's like a Jacuzzi!"

"I wonder where this leads too…" Kasumi opened a door into one of the rooms and switched on the light. "Wah! This place is so big!" The room was as big as the living room and came with a huge master bath.

"That's the master bedroom." Helena told her. "I'll be staying in here tonight." She threw her bag on the bed. "There's another room you and your sister can stay in, but you are going to have to work it out with Tina and Lei Fang."

"Oh, ok…" Kasumi replied.

Ayane stood in the dinning room. There was a big window overlooking the city nightlife, where she watched in pure fascination.

Half an hour later, the girls were in their pajamas watching a movie in the living room. However, throughout most of it, they heard the guys in the other suite screaming like crazy.

When Tina had enough, she banged on the wall. "Keep it down, assholes!"

The screaming stopped.

…………

"My farts don't smell like that!" one of the guys yelled out all of a sudden.

The girls exchanged glances. "Ew…"

"Oh my gawd," Ayane said, disgusted. "Now they are talking about farts? Those lamos!"

Tina banged on the wall again. "If they don't quit it, I swear I'm going to storm into their room and start cracking skulls!"

It eventually became quiet, but they still heard feint laughter throughout the rest of the movie. When it ended, Tina turned off the TV and stretched.

Helena sat up. "So what did you think about the movie?"

"I would've enjoyed it if only they weren't so frickin loud! They can be so annoying sometimes… But, can you believe he ended up getting with her?"

"That was expected." Helena critiqued.

"That ending sucked." Ayane complained. "It was stupid. Why did he end up breaking up with his girlfriend, who he's been with for six years, over some slut he met for only one day?"

Lei Fang, who was teary eyed, disagreed. "How could you say that?" She sniffed. "Don't you believe in love at first sight?"

"Oh, puh-leaze! Don't even get me started! Everyone knows it's just your hormones getting to you."

"Well, I think love is beautiful," said Kasumi.

Lei Fang smiled. "I totally agree with you."

Ayane rolled her eyes. "You two are just really girly. That's all!"

"You don't have a clue to what love means. You're too young to understand the philosophy of love." Lei Fang sneered.

"Are you with anyone, Helena?" Tina asked.

"Not right now, no. I haven't been dating lately."

"I've been dating," Lei Fang added. "But I never found the _one. _I guess all the guys I've dated never met my expectations. But I know the one meant for me is somewhere out there. I can feel it." Kasumi was moved by what she had said.

"Kasumi? How about you?"

"Umm… No… I, too, am waiting for the _one_."

"Ayane, are you with someone?"

"No! And I never will be!"

"You like boys, though, right?"

"I never said I didn't!"

"Hey, you know what? This is perfect!" Tina exclaimed.

"What's perfect?" asked Helena.

"We're all single ladies. Now would be a great time to go out dancing with out a care in the world!"

"Right now? It's really late."

"Yes, right now! We could, you know, go clubbing!"

"Oh I've never been clubbing before!" Kasumi squealed.

"See, now's your chance."

"But isn't Kasumi and Ayane a little too young to go though?" Lei Fang asked.

"This is Europe. A lot of things are allowed here." Tina walked towards her luggage. "C'mon, girls. Lets get in our best outfits!"


	7. In the Boys' Room

_(Disclaimer: I don't own anything from Dead or Alive, Team Ninja, or Temco.)_

* * *

"Hey!" Jan Lee shouted. "They have a PS2 in here!" Footsteps scurried from the other room.

"Where?" Zack asked as he barged in, followed by Hayate and Hayabusa.

"Right here!" He opened the cabinet wider to give them a fuller view.

"Sweet!"

"What game do they have?" asked Hayate. He sat down by Jan Lee on the floor.

"I don't know… I think there's a list in the TV. Hold on." He turned it on and flipped through the channels. "What the heck's this? Where do I go?"

Hayabusa grabbed the directional sheet on the side drawer table next to the couch. "It says here you have to press the 'B' button on the remote then select 'entertainment'. "

Jan Lee did exactly as told. A wide selection of games began to appear on the screen.

"Put it on _NCAA Football 2005_." Zack inquired. "I'll kick all of your guys' asses in that game!"

"Bring it on!" Jan Lee hollered. He grabbed the nearest controller. "Who you playing as?"

"Wait, where's the other controller?" Hayate questioned as he searched around. "Where'd you put?" he asked Jan Lee

"Don't look at me, I didn't touch it!"

"Uh, I think there's only one per room." Hayabusa implied.

"That's crazy!" exclaimed Zack. "We get a suite in a five-star hotel, and they expect us to play a football game with only one controller! I'm gonna- I gonna get mad!"

"Calm down, Zack! Geez…" Jan Lee stated. "We could play another game."

"Anyone up for Pandora Tomorrow?" Hayate suggested.

"Man, I finished that game a long time ago!" Zack bragged.

Jan Lee skimmed the menu. "DDR! That game is the bomb!"

Zack made a face. "What's up with you Asians and DDR?"

"Fatal Frame 2, I heard that game was scary." Hayate interrupted. "You have to kill ghosts by capturing them in a camera, or something like that."

"That game sounds weak. Let's play Driv3er…"

Jan Lee laughed. "What's the matter, Zack? Scared?"

"No… Heck, I could finish that game straight if I wanted to!"

Hayate, Hayabusa, and Jan Lee exchanged glances.

"Let's see you do it then." Hayate challenged.

They began the game. Within fifteen minutes, the boys were sent screaming their wits off. Zack was trying desperately to run away from a freaky looking ghost.

"Ahhh! Where do I go?! Where do I go?!"

"You idiot! You had enough time to snap a shot at her!" Jan Lee complained.

"Hey, you want to play this?"

Hayate pointed. "Go into that room!"

"No! That's where I met that one ghost!"

"A ghost will always appear in a room if you stay in it too long." said Hayabusa.

"Shoot!" Zack paused the game. "I'm not playing this!" He threw the controller on Jan Lee's lap.

"What are you doing?"

"You're the expert! You play!"

"Hell no!" He passed the controller to Hayate.

"Why are you giving it to me? I don't know how to play!" He threw it to Hayabusa. "It's your turn!"

"I didn't want to play this in the first place!" He was about to hand the controller to Zack, but all of them scattered before he had the chance. Hayabusa sighed. "Okay, I'll play!" he shouted.

Slowly, but gradually, each of them returned to the room, each carrying pillows and a blanket for themselves.

"All right, Ryu!" Jan Lee cheered.

Hayabusa unpaused the game. It was his first time playing, but he was a fast learner, and easily fought off the ghost. The more he progressed into the game, the more the guys had a reason to scream louder. It got so loud to a point where Tina began banging on the wall.

"Keep it down, assholes!"

"Did you hear that?" Hayate asked.

Hayabusa paused the game and turned to them. "Hey, try to stay quiet from now on. They're probably trying to get some sleep."

"I can't help it! This game scares the crap out of me!" Zack whimpered.

Hayate's nose cringed. He whiffed the air. "What's that smell?" _Sniff_ "Someone farted!"

Zack shifted uncomfortably. "Who ever smelt it dealt it."

"My farts don't smell like that!"

"Man, it smells like shit!" Jan Lee yanked the blanket off of Zack, brining out an explosion of shitty freshness.

"OH!" All of them wailed as they closed their eyes and turned away.

Jan Lee plugged his nose. "Dude, that stinks! You could've at least warned us, you know!" He grabbed the nearest pillow and whacked him on the head. Zack whammed him back.

"PILLOW FIGHT!" They all yelled. Hayate paired with Jan Lee while Zack paired with Hayabusa. Things broke. Feathers were strewn about. Bodies hit the floors, walls, and sometimes toppled over other bodies. Lots of giggling. The fight lasted for about ten minutes until Jan Lee began pondering and stopped.

"What's wrong?" Hayabusa asked.

"I don't know… Doesn't this whole scenario look kind of… awkward?"

Hayate and Zack stopped pounding each other.

"Uhh… Hmmm…" Hayate also pondered.

"We're not being girly though…" Zack added.

"Yeah. That's right..."

Silence.

"Let's get back to playing videogames." Said Hayabusa.

"Right." They retorted in deep manly voices. "We like playing videogames."


	8. Going to Autobahn

_(Disclaimer: I do not own anything from Team Ninja or Tecmo.)_

"You look great!" Tina complimented as Kasumi shyly stepped out of the bathroom. She was wearing a sparkly, milky pink spaghetti strap, with a white flowing miniskirt, and white high heels that strapped around her legs. Her hair was down with a matching silky, marbled scarf tied around her head as a headband. The knot was placed to the side so that its ends would hang over her shoulder.

"Umm… Lei Fang helped me out."

Tina observed her. "Hmm… Something's missing…" She grabbed a jewelry box out of her luggage and scavenged through it. "Ahah! Just what you need!" She pulled out a white choker with a pink diamond brooch.

"Oh, wow! It's beautiful…"

"And you'll be wearing it tonight. Come here."

Kasumi walked slowly towards her, a bit dazed.

"C'mon." She gestured. She grabbed Kasumi's shoulders and turned her towards the dresser mirror. "This is going to look great." Tina tied the choker around her neck. Kasumi watched through the mirror. She touched the diamond that was now perfectly placed on her neck.

"Thank you."

"No problem! Just don't loose it. It's really expensive." Tina looked at Kasumi. "It looks really good on you."

Kasumi smiled. She couldn't find anything to say.

"Well, I need to get ready."

Kasumi walked for the door.

"Wait – take this." She threw something to Kasumi.

"What is it?"

"Lip gloss! Every girl needs one." She winked.

Kasumi smiled and exited.

Out in the living room, she saw Lei Fang already dressed. Her hair was down, but instead of her usual bangs, it was held back by a black clip. She also applied eyeliner, making her appear more exotic. She wore a black v-neck halter-top, with dark denim boot-cut hip-huggers, and black stiletto heels. It was accented with silver hoop earrings and a charm bracelet.

"Oh my gawd! I love the choker!" Lei Fang remarked. "Where'd you get it?"

"Tina let me use it."

"Is that real diamond? And it's pink! I'm totally jealous. I like how it looks on you!"

Kasumi blushed. She was receiving so many compliments in one night.

"I like… umm… your outfit."

"Really? Thanks!" She happily began explaining where she goes shopping and where to get the latest fashions. Kasumi was easily lost.

Helena knocked on the bathroom door. "Ayane, are you sure you don't need any help? You've been in there for quite a while now."

_Shuffling. _"I think I can dress by myself, thank you!" _More shuffling._

"Just checking…" Helena muttered. She walked over to the curtains and closed them, making sure that there were no openings for peeping toms. She then took off her pajamas and put on a dress she had prepared earlier on her bed. It was a long, white, halter-dress, complimented with a crimson red bowtie for her hair and a pair of white high heels that she borrowed from Lei Fang.

"What do you think?" Tina said from the doorway. She took off her brown shaded sunglasses and began posing. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail, and on her ears were ruby studded earrings. She was wearing a sequined, American flag bikini top, a brown plated belt, and rusty denim jeans tucked into brown cowboy boots.

"Tina, that's very indecent." She said while applying lipstick in front of a mirror.

"What is?"

"That." Helena put the lipstick down and sucked her cheeks in.

"What?" Tina looked down. "My shirt?" She began laughing. "We're only clubbing!"

Helena turned to her and made a face.

"And what about you, miss perfect? You're completely out doing yourself with that long dress and all."

"It's Versace. It's the only dress I have with me."

"You need to jazz it up a bit." She walked over. "Mind if I do a little something?"

Helena hesitated a bit. "What are you doing?"

"Don't worry about it. Just trust me! I know what I'm doing." Tina grabbed the lower half of her dress and ripped it apart.

"Are you insane?! That was an eight hundred dollar dress!"

"Hmm…" She placed her finger on her lip. "I'd say I made it look better… and sexier. You look much more doable – if you know what I mean."

"Ugh!" She was shocked and disgusted. "I can't believe you just told me that!"

"It's true! Guys will be waiting in lines to wrap their legs around you!"

"Ugh!" She threw a shirt at her. "Will you stop?" she said playfully.

"C'mon, Helena! Where's your sensual side?"

Ayane opened the door and came out of the bathroom wearing a sparkly lavender tube top, with a leather miniskirt and suspenders attached. She was also wearing black thigh-high nylons and ankle boots. To make it more surprising, she had applied make-up and it didn't look bad. The two became quiet.

"What? Why are you guys looking at me like that?"

"Nothing. We just – we never saw you like this before, that's all." Helena looked at Tina.

"Wow, Ayane." Tina said completely amazed. "I didn't know you wore make-up. You did a good job!"

Ayane looked to the side. She blushed a bit. "I love doing make-up. It's one of my hobbies." She faced them. "But don't think I'm getting all girly on you guys! Just because I have a bit of eye shadow on, doesn't mean I'm a completely different person!"

"No! I don't think you're girly at all! You just look really… different!"

"Okay, enough about me! What about you? All of a sudden your butt is hanging out of your own dress!"

Helena gasped. She quickly turned to view herself in the mirror and was horrified with what she saw. Her lower cheeks _were_ exposed. "Tina! What did you do?!"

"I told you. I was going to do a little something to you're dress."

"You call that a little something? You ruined it! I'm basically naked!"

"Again, I'd say I made it look better! You agree with me, right, Ayane? Her dress looks better short than monstrously long?"

"I don't know. I guess."

"See! You look fine in the dress!"

"No I don't! I'm changing."

"Oh, will you look at the time?" Tina interrupted. "Our limo will be here in any minute!"

She shoved the two out of the room.

"You ordered a limo?" asked Ayane.

"What did you think we were going to take? A cab? No way, like that would ever happen." Tina called over to Kasumi and Lei Fang, who were chatting on the couch. "C'mon, girls! We're going!"_

* * *

_

Ayane and Kasumi were captivated by the inside of the limo. They looked through every nook and cranny including the snack bar and the liquor bottles.

"Those all come with the limo," Tina had informed them. "Knock yourselves out."

Kasumi looked through the ice chest next to her. "Oooh! Strawberry soda! It's my favorite."

"You're gross!" Ayane pulled out a bottle of grape soda. "Grape soda is better."

"Hmmm…" Lei Fang watched in fascination. "I find it amazing how you two are sisters, but tend to like the opposite things."

They glared at each other.

"I think that's cool. Different things make life interesting." Tina added.

"So, how do you know where we are going?" asked Helena.

"Simple. I just told Alfred over there to take us to the best club around here."

"Oh. You know his name?"

"No. I just call him that. Right, Alfred?" Tina tapped him on the back.

He replied something in German.

"What did he say?" asked Ayane.

Helena squinted her eyes. "I think he said we're almost there."

Kasumi shook her legs. "I'm nervous!"

"Don't worry. Just keep it real." Lei Fang ensured.

"Keep it real?"

"You know, just act yourself."

Ayane spotted the club as the limo drew closer. "_Autobahn…_"she read to herself. "What kind of name is that?!" There was a long line of people waiting to get in.

"There it is!" Tina pointed

"Where?!" Kasumi and Lei Fang asked. They moved forward for a better view.

"Over their!"

"Wow, that was a short drive," said Lei Fang, surprised.

Everyone quickly pulled out their make-up pouches and reapplied their make up. Kasumi, the only one without make up, picked the lip-gloss Tina gave her out of her pocket and slightly dabbed some on.

"Oh! I'm so excited!" Lei Fang wailed.

The limo came to a stop in front of the line of people.

Helena turned around to see them out the window. "There are so many of them…"

"How are we supposed to get in?" asked Ayane.

"Don't worry leave it all to me." Tina patted her hair. "Ready?"

* * *

The crowd watched curiously as they stepped out the limo: five glamorous beauties, each with their own exoticness. The crowd began to stir and some pictures were being taken. Tina blew a kiss towards them and began posing.

"Tina Armstrong!" you could hear people whisper to each other. Some began grabbing pens out for her autograph while others were wailing her name.

"I love you, Tina!" a man hollered in a heavy German accent.

"Thank you! I love you too!" she answered back. She began to sign autographs.

In no time, the paparazzi were everywhere.

"Tina! Tina!" One of them with a camera caught her attention. "Who are these lovely ladies here with you tonight?"

"Them? These are my girlfriends!" She pulled them forward. "C'mon, guys! Lets look great on the tabloids!" Lei Fang and Ayane began posing without hesitation, but it took a while for Helena and Kasumi to get into it.

"You girls are hot. Anything going on?"

Tina giggled. "We could be naughty if we wanted to…" she teased to leave them in question.

A well-dressed man came up from behind her.

"Excuse me, Tina Armstrong?"

"Yes?"

"I am the owner of _Autobahn_. I am very pleased to have you as our guest."

"Thanks!"

"Please, would you mind if I led you and your companions to the VIP lounge?"

"That would be great."

The owner, along with several bodyguards, led the way into the building, passed the enormous line. Everyone stared as they walked in.


	9. Game Over

_Hi guys! Hope you like this chapter. Me and my sister came up with it today... (Disclaimer: I don't own anyting from Dead or Alive, Team Ninja, or Tecmo.)_

* * *

"I think I'm going to face another boss in this room." Hayabusa warned. They had already been playing for nearly six hours straight, and so far have never died, thanks to Hayabusa's ability to play with well.

Hayate sat up. "Get your camera ready. Put on your powerful film. You only have eight, so you have to be careful."

Jan Lee grew restless. "Just go in already!"

Hayabusa took a deep breath. "Alright."

He went through the door and waited for the boss to show signs of its presence. The controller began to vibrate.

"Look at the meter! It's lighting up when you look over there!" Hayate pointed towards the right side of the screen. Suddenly, a hideous ghost appeared out of nowhere. Their hearts began to pump.

"Ahh!" Jan Lee yelped. "Back up more!"

He shot the ghost a couple of times, taking about a third of its health, but the ghost had gotten close enough where it attacked the character, draining half of his life.

"Health bar! Look at your health!" Zack shouted.

Hayabusa healed it and began shooting again. This time, he waited a bit more before he took the picture to gather more energy into the camera. Again, the ghost took a chunk of his health.

Hayate pulled forward. "Okay, its almost dead! Just shoot it one more time with a critical hit!"

Hayabusa adjusted the camera at a perfect angle to impact more damage.

"And shoot… now- What the?!" Out of the blue, the TV screen turned off and the room became pitch black.

"Crap!" Zack was searching desperately for the power button on the remote. "I was trying to put the volume higher."

Jan Lee was furious "What the hell happened? Turn it back on!"

"I can't find the power button!"

"Gimmie that!" Jan Lee tried prying it out of Zack's hand, but Zack kept a tight grip.

"Hurry up and turn it on!" Hayate pressured.

"How could you confuse the power button with the volume?!" said Jan Lee as he and Zack battled over the remote. With a desperate attempt, Zack slapped the remote out of Jan Lee's hand, making it fly in the air. _Plunk_… The batteries fell out.

"Ahh!" The three boys screamed.

Jan Lee tried jamming the batteries into the remote, but it was to dark to see what he was doing. "It's not going on!"

"You didn't put it in right." Hayate grabbed the remote and repositioned the batteries. The TV finally turned on. They waited anxiously to get back to the game, but instead there was a big Game Over on their screen. The four stood motionless in disbelief for a good five minutes.

Jan Lee turned towards Zack. "Are you stupid, or what?" He socked him on the arm.

Zack groaned and rubbed it. "Damn, man! Just go back to your last save spot!"

"We can't, we don't have a memory card!"

"Tch, I don't know then. What's done is done, right?"

"Oh, you think I'm gonna let you off the hook that easy, huh? Do you, huh?! Do you?!" He began shoving Zack, who stood up to gain more dominance.

"Yeah, and what are you gone do about it, punk?"

Jan Lee smirked and also stood up, now face to face with Zack.

"See this?" He grabbed a pen from the side table. "I'm gonna shove it up your ass."

"I see how it is… Going homo on me now?"

Jan Lee quickly threw the pen across the room, disgusted. "That's it. You've gone too far!" He jokingly wavered his hands as what he had seen in old Kung-Fu movies. "Woo… woo…woo... wah-tah!"

Amused, Zack also began wavering his hands. "Come on, I'll kick your ass!" The two began pretend fighting immaturely and took it all the way to the other room. Hayate also joined them. They seemed to have completely forgotten about the lost game, including Hayabusa, who was still staring blankly at the TV. He was the one who had to play the game, and all his work had been flushed down the toilet.

In the other room, Jan Lee and Hayate double-teamed and were beating up Zack, who cowered in the corner.

"Ok, ok! I give up!" he yelled. "You won!"

Jan Lee and Hayate laughed it off and helped Zack off the ground. Frustrated, he yanked his arm away from them. "That ain't right. Me against you two? That's not fair!"

Hayate yawned and scratched his head. "Whew. I think I'll call it a night." Ironically, it was 4 o'clock in the morning. "You guys enjoy your sleep together."

Jan Lee cringed. " I'm not sleeping with this guy! He's taking the couch!"

"What? Oh, so now the brother has to be the one to take the couch! I see!" The two began arguing again, so Hayate headed into the other room and threw himself on the bed.

"Ow!" Someone yelped in the dark.

Hayate became a bit alarmed. "Hayabusa?"

"You're on top of my leg…"

"Oh, sorry." He rolled over. He was a bit on comfortable, being two guys on the same bed. "I, I'll sleep on the floor."

"You don't have to. I don't care. Just go ahead and go to sleep."

"Suit yourself…" Hayate turned on his side to face the opposite direction of Hayabusa. He closed his eyes and fell easily fast asleep.

_Once Hayate returned from the lake with Margot, he set out towards his room, only to be stopped by a stifle sound from behind the bathroom door. Wondering whom it was, he bent down to take a look. It was Hitomi; she was sitting against the wall, with her legs pressed against her body. Was she was sobbing? He stood up and knocked._

_"Hitomi…"_

_"Go away Hayate!" she said with an unusually somber tone. Sniff… "I don't want to see you anymore!"_

_"Are you crying?" he asked her. "Why are you crying?"_

_"Can't you figure out why?" she said, clearly insulted._

_He couldn't answer back, because he didn't know the answer himself. 'Why is she doing this to me?' he asked himself. 'Why do girls always have to be so complicated?' He was growing irritated, but all in all he was just confused._

_Hitomi opened the door. Her eyes were streaming with tears and her face was red from crying. Her chest was heaving up and down. She looked so vulnerable at this point, she rarely did. This was probably the first time he'd seen her like this. She shoved him aside and locked herself in her room._

_The next morning, she acted completely normal, as if nothing had ever happened. _


	10. Schones Madchen

_Sorry for the delay. I was really busy doing schoolwork and all... Ineverreally had the energy totype one up. Plus my computer broke down, so yeah.Anyways, Ididthistoday just for you guys. No school today - woohoo! Hope you like it.(Disclaimer: I don't own anything from Tecmo, Team Ninja, or the Dead or Alive series!)_

_P.S.Don't worryHayate and thegang will eventually reach Hitomi's,but trust me,once they do... Well it's a suprise. Keep reading..._

* * *

"Welcome ladies," said the manager as he snapped his two fingers, "to the finestyou will evercome across in Germany, Club Autobahn..." One of the bodyguards who were standing aside, reacted immediately.

"Jawohl!" he cried in his loudest voice. He pulled on one of the handle to the double doors. "So ist das nun mal!"

Techno music blasted like a strong wind that had hit them in the face as the doors were being opened. A sudden surge of excitement ran all over Kasumi and Ayane's bodies. What Tina called clubbing, was entirely new to them. They didn't know what to expect.

'Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom.'

"Oh wow..." Kasumi stammered aloud, "so, pretty..." She was breath-taken by what she saw.

Laser rays and strobe lights flashed from within the building, randomly changing colors and movement patterns. Cages hung from the top of the ceiling, with arguably ugly women, dancing in nothing but high-heels, neon thongs, and matching, fluffy scarves. The whole place seemed to be crammed with people, with practically no place to sit, even though most of them were on the dance floor, freaking or whatnot.

"If you please follow me," spoke the manager as he led them through the crowd. The bodyguards were at their sides, shoving people aside to make way.

The group went up stairs and was led into the lounge room that overlooked the dance floor. There were only a couple booths there, but the place wasn't as crowded and the booths were cushioned. "Please ladies, take a seat. I'm giving you girls the best seat in the house. Your stay here will be quite the enjoyable one, no?"

"Why of course Alfred!" Tina stated, "We girls really know how to have a good time!"

The manager gave out a laugh. "Such charm, Miss Armstrong! And ahh, yes... The drinks are on me."

"Oh, why thanks, Alfred!" Tina exclaimed in an acted manner. "That's probably one of the nicest things a guy has ever done for me." She winked at him.

The manager blushed. "Ah... well yes. I'll leave you ladies to have some fun. Eh- the waitress should be stopping buy in a few moments." He walked away a bit pink.

"He's nice..."

Ayane cringed her nose. "Geez Tina, send him mixed messages why don't you?"

"What? He isn't Prince Charming, and he knows it. I did that man a favor. I made that man feel good about himself. Shouldn't I, like, receive an award for that or something?"

"Oh, brother!"

"Would you ladies like anything to drink?" A waitress interrupted, startling Kasumi, who was flushed with all the colors and the liveliness. It smelt like sweat and cigarettes, but there was something about being in the club that made her forget the smell was even there. There were so many attractive women on the dance floor – close to even intimidating. It definitely made her feel inferior.

Having sat near the edge, the waitress looked at Kasumi first for a reply, but it seemed to take her forever since she never once drank in her life. Kasumi panicked.

"Umm-"

"Ah," Tina butted in. "She'll have a butterscotch martini... and I'll have a Grey Goose on the rocks." She turned to Lei Fang. "What do you want?"

"Hmm... May I have a Havana Beach cocktail, please?"

"Sure."

"I'll have an Armadale." Said Helena

"And I'll have a Shirley Temple." Ayane added, coming up with the only thing she knew or had herd at one point in her life. She didn't want to sound like as stupid as Kasumi.

"Ok," the waitress skimmed through her pamphlet. "So I have a butterscotch martini, Grey Goose – on the rocks, Havana Beach cocktail, Armadale, and a Shirley Temple?"

"Yes." Helena replied.

"Ok, I'll be right back with your orders." The waitress left them to themselves.

'Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom'

"You call this fun..." Helena made a face. "It's terribly loud... and this odor is unbearable!"

Tina rolled her eyes. "Well... It's a club, you know! People like dancing to loud music... for fun. And besides... you're supposed to get all sweaty and wet..." Her voice drowned out as she eyed an attractive man passing by their booth. "And I am sure as hell getting really turned on right now." She began breathing heavily. "That guy is so hot..."

Lei Fang turned around to watch the man also. "God, you're right. He looks delicious ... oh..." She tilted her head. "Look at his tight... Oh my God..."

She watched as the man sat two booths behind them, facing their direction. The booth between them wasn't occupied, so he had a full view of them.

Lei Fang turned around. "Shoot..." She panicked. "You guys, he's sitting right in back of us..."

Curiously, Helena, Kasumi, and Ayane glanced his way a couple of time.

"You guys! Stop looking over there!"

"Why?" Ayane asked. "Can't let a guy know we're checking him out?"

Helena squinted. "Hmm... He's not my type."

"Are you kidding?" Lei Fang asked in disbelief. "He looks like Brad S. Pitts, George S. Looney, and Johnny N. Debt all in one package!"

"I'm just not into that whole 5 o'clock shadow thing."

"I can't believe you! What do you think about him, Kasumi?"

"Um..."

Lei Fang glanced at him one more time. She gasped. "Tina..."

"What?"

"That guy is so totally crushing on you right now."

"What? No!" She turned around to see the guy smiling. He raised his hand as to wave at her, saying as if he were saying 'hey.'

A bit flattered, Tina smiled and turned around towards her booth.

"What's he doing now?"

"He's getting up."

"Tell the truth."

"Seriously, he's... walking our direction."

"Do I look okay? How are my girls?" She fluffed her chest.

Ayane rolled her eyes. "Ugh! They look fine, as always!"

"Shh. Shh."Helenashushed. "Here he comes!"

Tina leaned toward the table, resting her boobs over her arms to draw emphasis on her chest. She began raising her eyebrows and puckering her lips, trying to give her most seductive look.

The man stopped in front of their table. He was tall, handsome, and very well built – so attractive, they couldn't find any words to say to him. Though obviously very athletic, he was dressed with that sense of style that screamed 'mature and experienced'. The man must have been around his mid 40s, and you could see streaks of gray in his clean cut hair, but it just added to his overall look. To them, he was a god.

"Hi!" Tina waved. The man looked at her and smiled.

"Darf ich um den nächsten Tanz bitten?" His voice was deep, yet soothing.

"Uh, heh-heh... I forgot we were in Germany." Tina turned to Helena. "What did he say?"

"I think he's asking you to dance. Say 'ja.'"

"Ja!"

The man gave her a weird look, and then turned to Lei Fang.

"Nicht. Schones Madchen. Darf ich um den nächsten Tanz bitten?"

Lei Fang's eyes widened. How could such man like him, notice something like her? Surely, Tina's watermelons would've caught his attention rather than her two small, but humble lemons (cough).

"How-?" Tina was dumbfounded. She watched as the man gave Lei Fang his hand and helped her out of her seat. He then led her towards the stairs. Lei Fang, a bit confused, looked back at the group. Kasumi smiled and gave her a thumbs up.

"What the hell just happened?!!"

Ayane smirked. "Well, it appears the guy actually had a thing for Lei Fang."

"Unbelievable! I thought he liked me! That's so not cool!" She bit her lip. " I mean, he was obviously sending me mixed messages!"

Ayane rolled her eyes. "Oh, spare the drama, please! Just get over it!"

"Whatever... Lei Fang's just lucky. I can get any man I want."

"Do you actually think that was a smart thing to do?" Helena asked. "I mean, he's practically old enough to be her father, and he clearly doesn't speak a word of English!"

"The man's cute. What could possibly go wrong?"

Helena sighed.

"Ooh!" Kasumi changed the subject. "Here comes the drinks!"


	11. Kasumi the Drunk

_Okay, here's another one of my dreadful chapters. (Disclaimer: I do not own the Dead or Alive characters or anything else from Team Ninja or Tecmo.)_

_Note: For those still itching about the German in the last chapter; Schones madchen means pretty girl. The man who walked up to the girls asked Lei Fang, not Tina, for a dance, just as Helena had interpreted. Jawhol means yes sir and ja means yes. In this chapter, Helena goes to the bar and asks for white wine. As for the music, you don't really have to know. Enjoy!_

* * *

"Ah…_hic_…excuse me! _Hic_…" Kasumi raised her finger to grab the attention from the waitresses, only to go completely unnoticed. "Damn… can't a girl get a drink around here?!!" She slammed her glass against the table. "…Ow…" she giggled, "I broke a nail… Um, waitress! Yoo-hoo!" She raised her hand again. 

Everyone looked at Kasumi surprised. She didn't seem a bit abashed by her unusual behavior.

"That's strange." Helena whispered to Ayane and Tina. "She's only had less than a third cup of alcohol, and she's already drunk as a hobo…"

Ayane pushed Kasumi's hand down. "Uh, I think you had enough of a martini for one night."

Kasumi gasped and made a face. "What are you doing?" She pulled her hand away and raised it again.

"You're drunk. Now don't ask for another one before you end up vomiting all over yourself!" Ayane pushed her hand down again.

"Quit it! I'm older than you for crying out loud!" She jerked her hand away from her grasp. "Now quit touching me! I'm trying to get a drink… _hic_…"

Ayane turned red.

'Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom.

Wie geht es ihnen?

Boom. Boom. Boom. De-boom. De-boom.

Boom. Boom. Boom. De-boom. De-boom.

Ja! Ja! Ja! Ja!!'

Tina snorted. "Gawd, these songs are so corny!"

"No kidding," Helena added.

Kasumi began to bob her head to the rhythm. "This… is my song! I… FEEL… THE MUSIC!" Her movement became more and morevixen-like as she lifted her arms and swayed her head from side to side.

"Whoo!" She stood up from her seat. "Come, let's dance!"

Tina excitedly scooted out of the booth pulling Ayane with her. But Helena sat still, reluctant to join.

"C'mon, Helena!" Tina encouraged. "It's time for your spanker to be spanked!" She did a slapping motion with her hand.

Helena grew uneasy. "No, no. I think I prefer to stay here and drink my,Armadale…" She took a sip from her glass. Tina sighed.

"No fun! I didn't bring us all the way over here for nothing!" She put Helena's drink aside on the table and pulled her away.

Together, the girls headed down the stairs and into the dance floor. There was barely any room to walk. Tina and Helena easily lost Ayane and Kasumi in the crowd.

"Tina, where's Kasumi and Ayane?" Helena asked as they walked through the swarm of people. Tina didn't answer back. She was already too absorbed into the music, mingling with a complete stranger and his partner. Helena stood alone.

"I knew this was a bad idea…"

She watched as Tina threw her moves all over the guy. Helena attempted to imitate her, but was horribly offbeat. She tried moving her hips, but they were so immobile, the only thing she could do was bend and unbend her knees and hunch her back. Unfortunately, Helena didn't know she was doing anything wrong. She thought she was making progress. Good progress.

"I'm doing it!" She thought to herself.

'Flap. Flap. Flap,' went her skirt along with her _(cough)_ spankers. Some perve snagged it from behind, causing her to jump. At first she was offended, but then she thought about it, and found it to be quite flattering.

Beaming with confidence, Helena butted her way between several couples, just like Tina had done. For some reason, she always ended up dancing by herself. Not too far, she saw a group of German women smiling and looking her way. She ignored them and tried dancing with more sensuality.

"This ought show them how good I can be." She said to herself. "Bend knees… Up down up down up down… Yes… Getting it… Hunch back… Looking good… Side to side…Feeling sexy… Heel toe heel toe… And jump!"

"OUCH!" A man angrily yelped.

Helena gasped. "Oh, I'm sorry!"

He looked at her and said, "If all you're going to be doing is stepping on everyone's foot, then do us a favor and 'get off the damn floor!'"

She covered her face and hurried for the bar. On her way, she heard laughter coming from the same group of women. She spotted them as they exaggerated and imitated her dance moves.

"Ja?" The bartender asked.

"Weiss wein. Merci."

'Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom.

"Yeah! I am steamin' hot!" Tina howled as she was being sandwiched between two women. At first the attention was focused on them, but out of nowhere, men began hollering at some other commotion happening at the other side of the club. Curious, Tina broke away and pushed through the crowd to find out what was driving the men crazy.

"Kasumi! Get down now!" Ayane bellowed, frustrated.

It only took one more butterscotch martini to send Kasumi drunk out of her wits – to a point where she climbed over a random table and had begun dancing. Men whistled and yowled as she vivaciously swung her hips and whipped her hair. She pulled the marble scarf off her hair and ran it through all _sorts_ of places, and that only made the crowd grow even wilder.

Tina clenched her jaws together. First Leif Fang, now Kasumi? She couldn't take any more of this. She walked up to Ayane and pulled her aside.

"Ayane! What's Kasumi doing?! And why is she dancing on the table!"

"Well 'I'm' not the one who bought her a butterscotch martini!"

"If she thinks she's better at attracting men than me, she's got it all wrong!" Tina climbed over another table and began dancing – and so the face off began.


	12. Men are Weasles

_The next chapter's up finally. Thanks to those who were patient enough and double thanks to those who reviewed. I wrote thisonerightafter I checked. Blah.Anyways, hope you enjoy this one! (Disclaimer: I do not own Dead or Alive, Team Ninja, or Tecmo.)_

* * *

"OOOH!" The crowd roared. They went nuts once they saw Tina joining Kasumi on the tables. The two seemed focus on winning the gold – or at least Tina was. Kasumi's probably a different story, but the competition was fierce. Tina tried her hardest catching the men's attention, pushing her breasts together or performing any type of movement that would make them jiggle. It turned out to be was very effective. The men were caught like deer in the headlights with their tongues waging out of their mouths. Pumped up to do a little more, Tina pulled off her belt and began wavering it around as if she was a dominatrix. She accidentally smacked a guy in the face because his big fat head was in the way. She didn't consider saying sorry, thinking she was too good to excuse herself from any of her actions. Surprisingly, he was happy to be smacked by the rowdy movie star.

"Wow!" He shouted to his friend in German. "Being belted by Tina Armstrong? This is a night to remember!"

His excited friend nodded in excitement.

Surprisingly, Kasumi was catching a lot of attention for competing against a Hollywood Actress. Thrilled by the cries of the crowd, Kasumi became more and more unbelievable. While Tina was juggling her assets and waving her belt around, Kasumi was performing kicks, splits, back flips, and somersaults all while keeping her balance. Her flexibility definitely enthralled the crowd. Ayane didn't root her on, but was impressed in that she showed her acrobatic abilities in such an explicit manner. She smirked at the thought of actually seeing Tina losing to Kasumi, which was unusual because Tina is very competitive or otherwise too stubborn to lose. However, it 'had' to happen. The guy next to her 'had' to say what he shouldn't have said.

"Hey!" he shouted, "Hey girl, take your shirt off!"

His body from time to time bumped against Ayane as he made boisterous bodily gestures trying to catch Kasumi's attention. He repetitively said the same thing in hopes of getting at least a glimpse of the girl's skin. Ayane became furious. She felt like smacking the pervert. He was old, and ugly too.

"Take it off! Yeah, take it – aw c'mon! TAKE IT OF!"

"Will you SHUT, the HELL up!" She screamed. "DAMN!" Does everyone here always have to be a perv!"

The man jumped back, frightened by her sudden outburst. He stumbled backwards wide-eyed and slowly backed away between the crowds. Ayane watched as he did so.

"Yeah, that's what I thought!" she muttered. "Men…"

Suddenly the crowd had uproar. When she heard this, she turned around to see Kasumi sitting on the top of Tina's shoulders. She could tell that Tina was totally suffocating in the damp musk between Kasumi's legs.

Ayane rolled her eyes. "Out of all of her moves, she 'had' to use the Uru-hein!"

Kasumi seemed content up there, wavering foolishly like a drunk as she swayed Tina who tried to keep her balance and at the same time catch her breath. The crowd went wild as the men's' hollering became even louder.

"What's going on over there?"

Helena joined Ayane by the ruckus, trying to see past the crowd of entangled men.

"Trust me, you don't want to know."

"No really, what's going on- AH! Oh my God!"

"I know. She's making a complete idiot out of herself."

"Ah, don't you think we should do something to help them?"

The crowd gave an abruptly, "OOOH!"

Tina couldn't keep her balance anymore, swaying to and fro. She took two steps off the table, falling into a pit of horny men. Helena and Ayane lost sight of them as if they were lost at sea. They immediately rushed towards them, pushing off men who were struggling aggressively to 'get some'. Hands were everywhere, groping what they could. Maybe even each other's if they didn't see it. Someone managed to snatch a piece of Ayane's bottom, which completely infuriated her. She turned around and punched him in the face. He fell over knocked out and with a bloody nose.

"Bitch!" The man's apparent sidekick yelled at her. He swung a heavy punch, missing her by an inch as she quickly dodged it. Then he tried throwing a chain of jabs, but she dodged all those too. Annoyed by his arrogance, Ayane ran up his body, onto his shoulders, and before he knew it, put the boot in his head, sending him flying across the room with a WOOSH! He took some men down on the way, bringing them into a frenzy of punching the hell out of each other.

"Wow, good job Ayane." Helena complimented.

"It comes natural," she replied. "I never let a man take advantage of me."

Helena smiled.

POW!

A man punched her in the nose for no apparent reason. Suddenly, her boil popped out like a daisy – and it hurt like crap! It was so disturbingly ugly, people around her cringed, without even seeing it!

"Now that's some beeg madda fagga!" The man laughed.

Helena turned tomato red. "You asshole!" She did an Uryu-banda into her Bokuho stance and tripped him with a Zenso-tai. He fell backwards, hitting the ground headfirst.

"High Five!" Ayane cheered. They slapped each other's hands.

"Let's get Tina and Kasumi," said Helena. "It's getting crazy in here!"

Ayane nodded. "Right."

It took a while for Helena and Ayane to dig through the mess. They found Tina and Kasumi unconscious on the floor with men trying to take advantage of them. One guy – the same old pervert telling Kasumi to take off her shirt - was about to lift it up until Ayane caught him.

"Eat pig-shit, you weasel!" She kicked him in the crotch and then turned to the others waiting for their share. "Who wants some, huh? Who wants a piece of this?"

"I do." Some guy joked, not knowing she kicked the crap out of the other guy. She threw a poisonous glare at him. Everyone gasped. They fell silent.

"If anyone does as much as lay a hand on my friends,I swear,we'll pummel all your asses to the ground!"

……………

"Got that!"

"JA…"

"C'mon, Helena. Let's get them out of here."

Good thing Kasumi was conscious enough to carry herself. Ayane picked her up by the arm. Unfortunately for Helena, Tina had to be knocked out like a cow, so she was having trouble picking her up.

"Umf!" She tried sitting her up, put she was too heavy and always fell to the side. "Ayane, I think I need help."

"I can't… Kasumi's heavy enough."

Helena panicked. Everyone was watching them, and after a serious load of butt kicking, they had to watch her make a fool of herself. Helena, making a second attempt, picked her up by the shoulders…

PLOP.

Tina fell on the floor.

"Umm…" She bit her lip. The only thing she was able to do was drag her by her feet, and that is what she did all the way to the curb, where the limo was waiting for them. The people still trying to get in watched in wonder as they saw Tina Armstrong get dragged out of the building and thrown into the limo. To make things worse, the paparazzi were everywhere, taking tons of pictures.

"Here's your spot on the tabloids…" Helena said sarcastically to the unconscious Tina. She quickly shut the door and asked the driver the drive them back to the hotel.

The car ride back was quiet. They were relieved to leave the club, but something didn't feel quite right.

"Why do I feel like we're forgetting something…" Ayane asked, bummed.

They both pondered for a moment, then looked at each other.

"Lei-Fang!"

"Lei-Fang!"

"Should we go back there?" Helena suggested.

"Oh no! I'm through with all of those perverts!"

"She's still with that other man… I'm guessing he would be able to give her a ride back. Hopefully she wouldn't misunderstand and think we ditched her."

"Of course not. She's probably just having a good time."

"Well, the club's not that far from here…"

"Don't even think about it. She can take care of herself."

"Hopefully, I guess..."


	13. That Didn't Happen

Story updated. Yay! -- Just typed it up today, which by the way was the pope's funeral day. Just wanted to mention that. Well anyways, hope you guys like this one and oh,tell me what you think. _(Disclaimer: I do not own Dead or Alive, Team Ninja, or Tecmo.)_

* * *

"This is really nice..." Lei Fang commented as she walked through the door. They had stopped by his hotel suite. "All this space to your self? I'd be _really _lonely." She turned to him, raising a brow. Though she knew he didn't know a word of English she felt like revealing a little of her dirty side, which was usually unlikely. She could tell by the grin on his face he was a bit turned on. He gestured for her to wait in the living room and disappeared down the hall. Lei Fang sat anxiously on the sofa. She spotted candles all over the room, so, being a romantic like herself, lit them all with her matchbook from Autobahn. There was a stereo on the side of the wall along with a collection of CD's. To set the mood, she hastily flipped through them, selecting the only CD that was not in German lettering: Marvin Gaye. "Perfecto!" she thought.

Just as the song had started, the German God suddenly came in with a bottle of champagne and two glasses looking very surprised.

Dancing playfully, Lei Fang sang aloud, "Let's get it on…. Oww!" For fun, she unhooked her bra and slowly pulled it out of her halter.

"Givin' yourself to me…should never be wrong… if your love is true!" She pointed her finger towards him and gestured for him to come closer. He walked towards her, and when they were close enough, she tucked her bra into his pocket, never losing eye contact. Abruptly, she caught a hold of his tie and pulled him closer. Their faces almost touched until-

"Whoa!" Lei Fang screamed. They lost balance and toppled over onto the couch, both of them chuckling. The laughter had died down, and they were left looking at each other in silence – an intimate feeling grew inside her. He softly began kissing her neck, leaving her in a state of utter breathlessness.

"Jan Lee…" She couldn't help but whimper out loud.

The kissing stopped and the man looked at her a bit confused. The moment was shattered.

Ring…… Ring…… Ring……

He muttered something in German before he got up and walked intothe otherroom to answer the phone.

"You idiot!" Lei Fang muttered to herself. She smacked her forehead. Why did she do such an idiotic thing? Even worse – why did she say Jan Lee? She truly hated him. Right?She shook her head and poured herself a glass of whine. Crystal. This man is very impressive. Way better standards than Jan Lee, who probably would have offered 99 cent grape juice in paper cups. This man just might be the one. He was experienced, mature, and so damn sexy! (Something Jann Lee would never live up to... Ugh, boys!)She felt like she had a connection throughthis man– even though she really needed to improve in her German. But over all, he was exactly what she wanted. It's like she knew him already. His eyes reminded her of someone she knew, but couldn'tquite hit the spot.

She glanced around. His wallet was on the floor. He must have dropped it when they were fooling around. She picked it up and flipped it open. Credit card… more cards… German currency… condom… picture.

"Who's this?" Lei Fang wondered. She began sipping on her champagne. It was a picture of him with another girl from a far. "She's cute…" she thought. The girl was leaning on his shoulder and smiling. She squinted, trying to get a closer look at her. From what she could tell, the girl was considerably young. Petite, but very athletic at the most. She had faded blue eyes and brown, shoulder-length hair with a pink headband…hmm…

PINK HEADBAND!

"Cghh!" Lei Fang choked and spewed champagne all over the carpet. "He's with Hitomi?" Lei Fang thought to herself. She panicked and brainstormed for some options. She could either run the hell out of there or spend the night very carefully.

"I gotta get out of here." He was irresistible, but a lifetime friendship was more worth it than a one-night stand. Quietly, Lei Fang grabbed her purse and tiptoed out of the room.

"Taxi!"

* * *

"Hahahaha…" 

Feint laughter could be heard.

"- Shut up!"

" You're crazy man! You know they're going to kill you, right?"

"Yeah, yeah… Help me braid his hair."

"Tch. You think I know how to braid? You do it!"

"Dumb-ass! It's not hard! Look, you take the hair, split them apart, and twist them together like that! Er…. It doesn't look right, but that's how you do it."

"That's tacky."

"Who cares! Where's that butterfly clip at?"

"Got it… let me-"

"What are you doing? Put it on him – no! Not him – Him! …Okay, there."

"You gotta admit, they look pretty good."

_Smack._

"Ow!"

"I'll pretend like I didn't here that."

"Let'sjust hurry andtake the picture already."

"Alright, make sure to hide once I do. ...Smile, sleeping beauties!"

_Flash. Flash. Flash. Flash._

A blinding light had caused Hayabusa to open his eyes. He was dazed and half asleep. Light everywhere. But what here? A girl sleeping right next to him? What are the odds? She had the most beautifulest ginger hair he had ever seen. He smiled and carelessly caressed it off her face. He was a bit annoyed, because there was laughter, and he couldn't figure out where it was coming from.

"Hey Kasumi……"

The laughter grew even louder.

"You know… You have really nice hair… Do you know that, hmmm? Do you know that Kasumi? I can never stop looking at it. It's so... flippy..."

"……Thanks, Ryu." The girl replied. Her eyes still closed. "I always thought your hair was better."

"Your hair…… I think it smells like fruit loops."

The girl giggled – except that it was curiously manly.

Zack and Jan Lee couldn't take it any more. They fell to the floor bursting with laughter. Jan Lee wouldn't stop pounding the ground. The loud racket startled the sleeping beauties, and Ryu and Hayate had awakened, finding themselves locked in each others' arms – and they looked like girls.

They gasped. Hayate fell off the bed. Ryu was still confused.

"Where's Kasumi…?" Ryu snapped. "What's going on?"

"What are you talking about?" Hayate stood up and scratched his head. "And why do you look like a girl?"

Ryu sat up. "Wha-?"

"You're the one wholooks like a girl!"

"Yeah? Why don't you look in the mirror?"

Ryu turned to the mirror. To his horror, hisface was just asmessed upas Hayate's. Powdered, lipsticked, and _gasp, _braided!

"You make a pretty fine lady Though." Hayate laughed.

"Really? So do you."

"Oh?"

There was a loud ruffling coming from the closet. All of a sudden, a laughing Jan Lee and Zackfell through the door – camera at hand andfaces reddened.

"Hahahahaha!" They laughed aloud.

"Oh Kasumi!" Zack imitated, in ahigh-pithcedvoice. "I just LOVE your hair! It's so, so RED!"

"Oh ya don't say?" said Jann Lee, playing along. They were in chronic laughter, not stopping until Jann Lee suddenly did. Zack wondering why he stopped, looked at him and said,

"What?" He turned his head. "Ah!"

Hayate and Ryu were glaring at them with fire in their eyes. Their vulgar shadows slowly crept upon the two jokesters, who clung onto each other like a pair of Twinkies. The ninjas were in hot pursuit for revenge. And how the saying goes, 'revenge is best served cold.'

"MOMMY!"

"MAMA!"


	14. Just Add Water

Wow, haven't been updating lately. Here's my latest. I actually had it ready months ago but was too lazy to put it up. Bad me. **>:) **Anyways hope you enjoy and I have more chapters coming up very soon. _Disclaimer: I do no own Dead or Alive!_

* * *

"Erh…….." Ayane gave out a groan, fatigued from last night. She didn't get much sleep. The guys next door didn't shut up until 4:00 in the morning. Someone created a big ruckus while walking around the suite. Kasumi sleeping next to her wouldn't stop throwing her leg over her the whole night - scratch that, morning. And now she could hear the boys getting all rowdy again. She realized that they were outside in the hall by the front door. 

Ding ……Dong… Knock. Knock. Knock. Knock.

"……Great…..." she exhaled.

Ding……Dong… Knock. Knock. Knock.

Momentary silence…

Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding……… DONG… The ringing then continued vigorously.

"Get the door!" Tina yelled grouchily from the living room, even though she was the one closest to the door. However, no body made an attempt to move out of their spot.

Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding…

"Will somebody get the frik'n door! Damn!"

Annoyed, Ayane threw her sheets off, making Kasumi flinch into fetal position. She groggily walked out of her room.

Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding…

She could hear the guy's laughter from outside the door.

"Cut it out!" She yelled. But the ringing still continued. Obviously, this was Zack's doing.

"Oh you're getting it Zack!" She told her self as she threw open the door enraged. However, her face flushed when she saw that it was not Zack's but Hayabusa's innocent finger that was rapidly tapping the doorbell. What got to her the most was the devilish grin that was on his face.

"Ryu-"

"Uhh…. Oh!" He quickly hid his hand when he realized Ayane had opened the door.

"Ayane…" He greeted, quite embarrassed. The Hayate and Zack scoffed.

"Move out of the way – we're hungry," a restless Jann Lee ordered as he shoved Ayane to the side to enter. He paved the way for everyone to follow him inside.

"Hey!" Ayane barked, not appreciating his arrogant greeting.

They barged in happily chatting amongst themselves in a loud manner. It had something to do with braiding hair, Jann Lee's(?) makeup, black pancakes, and how stupid Hayabusa was for getting caught and not paying any retribution for it. Their chattering broke into laughter after having found Tina knocked out one the floor, looking like a mess. Her heavy make-up had smeared all over their face like a badly done clown. Lei Fang, too, was knocked out on the couch, but wasn't trashed up like Tina was.

"So, what were you guys up to last night?" Hayate asked curiously.

"Nothing much. Just a girl's night out."

"What? And we weren't invited?" Zack whined.

Ayane sneered. "Hell no! It already sounded like you guys were having fun on your own last night anyways."

"We weren't even up for very long!"

"No, really? You guys were still at it until 4 o'clock in the morning! I don't know how you managed to wake up two hours later, but I've hardly gotten any sleep at all because you guys wouldn't shut the hell up!"

"Well, so-rry, little princess!" Jann Lee retorted sarcastically.

Zack, with his pondering eyes skimmed over Tina – excluding her ruined face. "Dang, you guys were decked out and everything! Tina's got that little stripper look going on."

Ayane rolled her eyes. "What are you guys doing here anyways? There's room service, you know."

"Yeah, but it was all in German," replied Zack.

Hayate stepped up. "We went out to look for a grocery store and bought some pancake mix. And I don't know how, but Zack and Jann Lee ended making the pancakes, and they came out like crap."

"And?"

"Well, we were thinking you guys know how to make pancakes… being girls and all."

"Sexist! Pssh-!"

"Ni-san?" Kasumi stepped out from the hall. She was rubbing her eyes. What she didn't know was that Zack, Jann Lee, and Hayabusa were in the room – and she was merely dressed in her pink padded bra and a bunny patterned panty.

Jann Lee and Zack whistled lightheartedly.

"Your sister's developing just fine." Zack told Hayate as he scanned her up and down.

It made Hayate's blood boil listening to them as they were commenting his little sister.

Hayabusa, who had flushed red all over his face couldn't help but turn away and hide his little smirk. Never before had he seen Kasumi so cute and – he'd hate to admit it, but was beginning to think of her as sexy. He still remembers the days when Hayate would have to go with Kasumi to the store to help her buy training bras. He was completely humiliated that one time his schoolmates passed by practically choking in laughter as they lifted their shirts and pressed their chests against the window. But back then, he would never have guessed she would become the young woman she is now. A deep feeling began to grow inside him. He somehow wanted to cover her up. Not to save her humility, but rather to shield her away from the unworthy eyes who happened to see the crowned jewel. He felt that such beauty was for his eyes and only his eyes only.

Hayate didn't like what he was seeing. Not at all. "Kasumi! Put some clothes on!" he barked.

Kasumi snapped out of here tiredness as she glanced down in horror. "Oy! Sorry!" She said as she dashed for her room.

"Hey, don't say sorry!" Zack yelled. He chuckled. "Damn, she's fine."

"Yeah," Jann Lee agreed. "In a weird kind of way."

Hayate groweled. "Look, if you're gonna be talking about my sister that way, at least don't talk about it in front of my face. It's creepy!"

"Chill, dude!" Jann Lee said. "It's not as if I want to hook up with her or anything like that."

"Ugh!" Ayane thought to herself. She had stood there this whole time bearing how the guys were talking about Kasumi this Kasumi that. She was a bit hurt after she saw Ryu's reaction when she came out. "She just _had_ to come out like that when _he_ was over…" She wished that somehow, just once, could she be in a situation like that. But whom was she kidding, it would never happen, right?

Helena stepped out a bit dazed after Kasumi ran passed her half naked. "What was that about?" she thought, realizing what it was when she found everyone chatting in the living room. "Good morning everyone. So what's the big event?"

"Oh nothing." Ayane retorted. "These losers had trouble making pancakes back at their place. So they came over here as if we were house-wives!"

Helena smiled. "Aw, that's just adorable. Where's the box? Let's get started."

The guys excitedly crowded around the counter as Helena prepared the ingredients listed on the box:

WATER

"Ok, let's see how much pancake mix you guys left over…" She opened the box to find only about 2 cups of pancake mix left. "Oh… that makes about 14 pancakes. I guess that's enough for all of us? Right?" She turned and nodded to the guys. They nodded half-heartedly.

'Oh yeah…', 'Sure thing', 'Why yes, o-of course!', was the general reply.

"Ok! You know, the trick is to just follow directions… and all it says here is to add water, how convenient." She set a pan out on the stove to pre-heat it, then took out a bowl from the cupboard, poured the mix and an required amount of water, and stirred them together to form the batter. "Now make sure to mix it well, but not too much that the pancakes turn out dry… and do catch the batter that gets caught on the side, it's a horrible mess to clean afterwards. If the pan isn't non-stick, then you should use oil or butter, but in this case we don't have a proble-."

"Wait!" Jann Lee slammed his hand on the counter. "I lost you. So 'when' exactly do you stir in the eggs!"

" You dumbo!" Zack scolded. "She just told you! You put the eggs 'after' you mix the batter!"

Hayate and Hayabusa smacked their foreheads.

"This is exactly why our pancakes came out like crap." Hayate explained to Helena, who was bit amused. She nodded understandingly.

"Well, we're almost done. All we have to do is pour it into to the pan."

"Finally! I thought we'd never finish!" Zack complained.

Helena began to pour the batter in the pan. It slowly oozed out, making a sizzling sound. "What you should know is that no matter how they come out, they almost always come out tasting great… I can smell it already…" She inhaled. "Mmm…"


	15. Pancake Wars

"MMMMMMM…!" Someone groaned from behind them. They turned around to see Tina and Lei Fang up and ready without a hangover.

"Is that pancakes I smell?" Tina asked

"Yes. I'm cooking breakfast." Helena replied as she flipped a pancake.

The guys burst out in laughter after seeing Tina acting normal with her clown face on. She was completely clueless and looked hideous.

"What?"

"Nothing." Jan Lee answered smiling. "You look great, by the way."

"Thanks!" Tina replied, thinking she had caught everyone's attention with her immaculate face. "You know, through my experience of being a professional entertainer and all, I've learned that you always have to look good no matter where you go."

"Yeah, that's a great mentality. You look better than you ever have." Zack's face wouldn't stop crinkling.

Hayabusa sighed. It wasn't unusual that the two would team up together and feed off each other's remarks as they joked about something in particular. He faced Hayate. "Here they go again. It's best to stay out of this one."

Hayate nodded, knowing how Tina can transform herself into a she-man and perform a pile driver on them without much effort. They turned around to help Helena with the pancakes

"Yeah." Jan Lee added. He scratched his chin. "I uh, I love that look you got going on. It brings out your uh… It brings out the real you."

"Really?"

"Yeah it does..."

Lei Fang didn't understand the amusement at first, but caught on quickly after looking at Tina. "_Ahem_." She coughed to catch Tina's attention and gestured at her face.

Tina raised a brow confused and glanced at a framed mirror hanging on the wall.

"Why you little sons of a -!" Angrily, Tina threw a pillow at the two laughing jokesters who successfully dodged the pillow, but ended up hitting their heads against each other.

"Oww!" They yelped rubbing the bump on their heads.

While the two were busy massaging their heads, Tina stomped Zack on the foot, huffed with her nose in the air, and angrily stomped to the bathroom. Zack fell forward, clutching his foot as he rolled on the floor, crying in pain, "why me! Ahh…"

"Dude, that means she likes you."

Zack lowered his voice down to a subtle dog whimper. "She does?" sounding a bit enlightened as if more nonsense of scheming and ploys to draw in the love of his life were aroused in his head.

Lei Fang shook her head. "That was really mean of you two. You shouldn't do things like that to her."

"Boo-hoo." Jan Lee said sarcastically. "I'm the one starving here and all you ever think about is yourself!"

Lei Fang was taken aback, with half of her mind trying to find any relevance to the statement, and the other half trying to figure out if it had anything to do with his feelings for her – if he had any!

"What?" Ayane butted in after having been silent this whole time. "That doesn't even make any sense!"

"Was I talking to you?" Jann Lee snapped looking dead serious. "Stay out of this… shorty," he decided too add a few seconds too late.

Zack found this unreasonably funny and laughed aloud, rather too much.

"Okay Zack, that was a bit over-rated…"

"Pancakes are ready!" Helena chirped happily, ignoring the commotion. They were golden brown, crisp, and fluffy. The smoke steaming out looked absolutely appetizing. Some how, Helena managed to make cute little happy faces on each of them. She was actually quite proud of what she'd done, feeling practical for once.

"Alright!" Zack shouted, quickly rising to his feet as if the fight between Jann and Lei Fang had never happened. He moved towards the plate of pancakes in Helena's hands, making an attempt to get first dibs on the hottest flapjack on top of the stack. His plan was to at least get five or six pancakes and make a run for it, for he knew he had to share a total of 14 with 3 others, and that's excluding the opposite sex, whom according to his theories and observations, simply don't eat. It was the survival of the fittest between a pack of hungry young males, and one or two pancakes each just won't do.

Jann Lee, sensing that there was a weasel among the group, (cough, Zack), tried to outmaneuver him, knowing what was coming underneath his sneaky, no-good sleeves. Stopping him would do no good, so he decided to grab what he can before anyone else would. But Hayate and Hayabusa were already at the front trying to grab their fill.

The four men closed in on her in a frenzy of hands and morning breath, all in a violent manner that Helena who became alarmed by the sudden aggression, instinctively lifted the plate above her head to only be overtaken by such dominant physicality of the male species. She gave out a little scream.

"Gimme! Gimme! GIMMIE!"

"Hey! Wewere here first."

"Me First! I'm the oldest!"

"You two already ate pancakes!"

"Gimme! Gimme!"

"We have to divide them evenly…"

"They were burned you nimrods!"

"Cause you burnt them!"

"So now everything's my fault now?"

"Wait… ouch! Quit it!"

"Hey, you ate all the chips in the van!"

"Gimme! Gimme!"

"Since when were chips pancakes! Now get out of my way!"

"Two words, N-O!"

"I'm sorry, but I didn't know 'NO' was composed of 'two' words!"

"Gross, man I can still see the jizz stuck between your fingernails."

"Gimmie! Gim- Hahahaha! He 'does' have a point. You're the only one who didn't wash your hands after we had that came fest!"

"_Shut up, will you!"_

"Okay… now I'm certainly not letting any one of you touch my pancakes."

"Helena, you know I love you and your pancakes?"

"Um…."

"You don't deserve first dibs!"

"Guys, no need to fight over pancakes."

"Who said we were fighting over pancakes?"

"We ARE fighting over pancakes!"

"We are?"

"What the hell!"

By now four large hands were pulling the plate opposing Helena's small hands, pulling with all her might away from the filthy hands. The ruckus was aggravating her so much she made a final and desperate attempt to jerk the plate away.

"Let GO of it, NOW!" she roared as she pulled the plate away with all her strength. As the guys let go, she lost her balance, her frail body toppling out of the opened window that stood behind her. You could hear her as her screams became more distant. Then came the expected…

"SPLAT!"

The four boys slowly peered out the window. Hayate pulled back to vomit.

"Oh my Gawd! You killed Helena!" screamed the frantic Lei Fang and feinted. It was true, Helena was…

Dead.

_To be continued…_


	16. Confusion at the Table

_Hello peoples:D Wow, it's been a really long time since I've been here. I have been getting some requests in my email to update this story recently. I've actually had several chapters to attach but I've never bothered to post them until now - sorry guys! So... here we are! I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I've enjoyed writing this stuff up. Disclaimer: I do no own Dead or Alive!_

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**Psyche!**

We fools you! We're tricksies, my Precious!

All of that was played out in Ayane's imagination. Here's what _really _happened:

"Let GO of it, NOW!" she roared as she pulled the plate away with all her strength. As the guys let go, she lost her grip of the plate, her freshly made pancakes flew out of the opened window behind her. You could hear Helena give out a low murmur as she watched the group of smiling pancakes falling from a distance. Then came the expected…

Plop! Plop! Plop! Plop! Plop! Plop! Plop! Plop! Plop! Plop! Plop! Plop! Plop! Plop!

The four boys slowly peered out the window. Hayate pulled back to grind his teeth.

"Oh my God!" Helena screamed angrily as her legs collapsed to the ground. Her hair was frizzed like that of a lunatic's. "You imbeciles!" She wiped the sweat off her reddening face. "Now look what you've done! Look what you've done! I mean - I've went through all this trouble of using my bare hands to make pancakes for you – which I normally don't do, and trust me, I don't like it anymore than anyone else does – and this, is the thanks I get! Good Lord!"

There was a silent pause.

"So…" said Zack, clearly unsympathetic to what just happened. "I guess this means we're just going to have to go out and eat at fancy five-star restaurant now? Aren't we?"

"Awww, shucks," said Jann Lee, "I think you're right for once, Zack, my friend…"

Helena, in all her desperation gave out a reluctant laugh, but once she did, found herself not willing to stop. She was embarrassed for her un-ladylike reaction and hoped that a little laughter would get everyone to forgive her. Fortunately guys are the forgive-and-forget type with little sticky situations like this. They easily forgave her once she asked for their forgiveness, without completely understanding why she was asking for it in the first place.

The gang arrived at the "Heine" restaurant, where Helena had reserved one of the best tables in the house. The restaurant was grand and lavish. It had a tall ceiling supported by large marble pillars and beautiful crystal-chandelier hanging down from the middle. There were mirrors on every wall, giving the illusion that the room was bigger than it actually was. The floor was covered in a velvet carpet of geometric designs. Crimson and gold seemed to be the main color theme. The restaurant was full when they arrived. It would have taken a week in advance to get a spot inside unless you were someone with money, but for Helena that was no problem, especially since she hinted that a famous movie star was in her party.

The table Helena reserved, a thin elongated mahogany, was the one nearest to the only window in the room. It gave out a breathtaking view overlooking the city and many of its historic buildings. The sun was out, the sky was blue, plant life was green; the girls immediately took a liking to this, shown in their spurts of enthusiasm. In spite of this, the boys didn't seem to show much appreciation. The only things they had on their mind was the food that they were going to eat.

As one would suspect, Helena took the head of the table. Hayate took the seat to her right, anticipating that the guys would follow and sit near him. However to his dismay, Kasumi and Ayane were battling for the chair next to him, giving the rest of the guys a reason to pass him up. Kasumi came out victorious in the end. Once she sat down, she took one of Hayate's arms and placed it over her shoulder, a smug look placed upon her face. She loved him very much. Lei Fang took a seat to Helena's left, leaving Ayane fourth closest seat to Hayate, which was across from him – with a stupid Kasumi under his arm. Luckily Ryu took the seat next to her. She flushed, but still a little flamed over Kasumi's seat. Zack and Tina were at the other end of the table, across each other. Zack was extremely happy about that; Tina really didn't seem to care at the moment. And that leaves Jann Lee, who got the opposite end, facing Helena.

"This restaurant is famous for their soups and offer a delectable choice of fresh seafood." Helena informed the gang as they skimmed through the large menu already placed out on the table. "I've actually never been here before, but my friends have recommended me to this restaurant many times."

"Seafood? I love seafood!" Tina exclaimed, causing several heads to turn. They were first repulsed by such bad mannerism given from the young woman, eventually dismissed it after they have recognized her face. "Ooh, look! They have lobster!" She leaned over to Hayabusa pointing at a picture of a stuffed lobster. "That's what I'm getting!"

Jan Lee easily became frustrated skimming the menu as it was written in German and he didn't have a clue what anything was. "How the hell am I supposed to know what I'm eating?" He ranted to Zack, who was also having trouble of his own. His menu was even upside down and he hadn't noticed until Tina pointed it out.

Everyone was basically left with choosing what ever they saw on the sample pictures. The boys ordered the day's special since it was the biggest picture on the menu. Lei Fang ordered a salad. Kasumi ordered chicken. Helena ordered salmon. And Tina ordered a 35 ounce lobster. Helena was the first to give her order when the waiter arrived. She already knew what she was getting and didn't have any trouble pronouncing the words either. It was her companions, however who were having trouble. They took forever to choose what they wanted. And when they did know what they wanted, they pointed at the pictures. Tina, Zack, and Jann Lee were making attempts to correctly pronounce the name, but they were boisterous people and laughed aloud at how funny it sounded. Helena was a bit abashed to be around a graceless party in rich presence. She slyly covered her face with her hand. It took nearly 10 minutes to confirm what the orders were. As they waited, they happily chatted amongst one another.

"Damn, that special looked good!" Jan Lee shouted excitedly. He was rubbing his hands together and nodding his head of approval at the guys, who were also getting the special.

"It must've been at least this big." Zack added as he spread his arms exaggeratingly.

Tina scoffed. "Ok, that's way too big."

"Thanks, Tina." Zack joked.

"Sicko…" Tina cringed as Zack winked at her. She turned the other way to ignore Zack's come-ons and placed her arm around Hayabusa, fiddling with his long hair as she complimented its health and tried convincing him to cut it.

Talking to Tina about cutting your hair because it would make you look cuter or deciding what conditioners make the smoothest hair wasn't Hayabusa's favorite topic. He couldn't do anything about it because Tina was such a talking machine, so he was forced to listen and pretended to be interested. She had been only talking for 3 minutes and it already. seemed like an hour. It was particularly odd for him when he began to imagine himself binding Tina's hands together and duct taping her loud mouth. He's normally very patient and calm, but now he was beginning to get frustrated.

He needed some kind of divine intervention, and he got it. Almost at an instant, all his feelings of frustration had vanished as he had felt someone's delicate toe beginning to lightly rub on his foot. Hayabusa's blood rushed through his body, feeling excitement yet still confused. Tina's words were now a mere humming as he began nodding his head to the rhythm of her speech. He looked across from him to see the smiling angel talking to her brother and occasionally glancing at him where there were moments were he could have sworn she was looking deeply into his eyes.

Through the hustle and bustle of the table's loud conversations he sat there quietly exchanging his smiles. Could it be that she's finally expressing her true feelings toward her? It felt so good to know how she felt about him, because at times he felt unsure. Though feeling extremely guilty at the time, he savored every moment of it as the foot had slowly begun to climb higher into his legs. Up the shin… Over the knee… And then it just stood there, resting on his thigh. It was curiously heavy. Hayabusa shifted uncomfortably. Unlike Kasumi to do so, but it wasn't unwanted physical contact. He let it be as he smiled to himself.

Mixed emotions were stampeding all over Ayane's head. She had suspected some unusual behavior going on between Ryu and Kasumi as they were smiling and glancing at each other in some instances. Sometimes Ryu would just put his elbow on the table and take it off instantly or cough and scratch his head. Kasumi was giving him some looks, squinting her eyes and smirking. The notion that Kasumi was beating her in everything had been getting to her. And now to rub it in, Ryu wouldn't stop looking at Kasumi. At this point for a teenage girl, one would have begun to internally break down, but Ayane always preferred to be stronger, so she tried ignoring the chemistry going on though it wasn't hard to miss or rather it wasn't hard for her to miss. She tried joining into the others' conversations.

"Tina wants me really bad right now…" Zack whispered to Jann Lee.

Jann Lee rolled his eyes. "Oh really?" He asked unbelievingly. They had already been over this many times, and unsurprisingly, Jan Lee would always be the one right.

"Hehehe…. Look at her face…grr…" He bit his lip.

"Dude, she looks normal! Give it a rest already! I'm tired of talking about this dump!"

"She looks like she's just talking to Hayabusa right? But what she's really thinking is, 'Oh God, I want that beef in my taco!' I tell you, she's just playing hard to get. That's the way girls are bro, I know, I know."

"Oh yeah! I can tell that when ever she blinks, she's thinking about you!" Jann Lee added sarcastically.

"That's what I'm talking about! She's not reacting or anything! That means she wants me!"

"You're wack."

"Hey, sorry you're not playa material like me. I think Lei Fang's getting more action than you man."

"Pfft, Lei Fang? That tweenager? She wouldn't get anywhere – yeah what about Lei Fang?"

Zack scoffed. "Okay, remember this morning how she was knocked out at the hotel?"

"Yeah."

"She wasn't wearing a bra."

"…So?"

"'So?' Come on man, she _always_ wears them when she goes out! She has to! She's got small ass titties!"

"Shiz, you actually pay attention to that?"

"It's like I've got the sixth sense with the opposite sex or somethin. Think about it, she could've just taken it off before she hit the sack, but if she was tired and all knocked up from clubbing, then she wouldn't bother changing, which she didn't. Anyways Lei Fang's super padded push-up bra has now gone missing and now her tits are a negative zero. Meaning that the only situation in which she can lose her super padded push-up bra is by getting caught up and giving it up as token to get fresh with some guy - or 'girl…' Heh, heh, heh." Zack gave out a weasely laugh.

Jan Lee was surprised to hear some of Zack's bizarre theories on women; they were shallow, but it was still very observant of him. For some weird reason he wanted to know more about Lei Fang and her so-called "action" she had received last night. Not that he found Lei Fang any more interesting than that. She was always extra annoying whenever he was around, so he doesn't like standing alone with her for too long. 'I'm just curious,' he kept justifying to himself.

"Who the hell would want to hook up with Lei Fang?"

"What'cha guys talking about?" Tina joined in after loosing interest in her own conversation with Hayabusa. She had eventually noticed that he wasn't exactly all there at one point.

"None of your business, I thought you were talking to Ryu?"

"I don't know, he's weirding me out right now."

Jann Lee and Zack looked at him. They busted out laughing.

"He looks constipated."

"I know, right?"

"Yeah…" Zack said in a creepy tone out of nowhere. He was giving Tina a creepy stare, one with an up-to-no-good twinkle in it.

Angrily, Tina yelled, "You're gross Zack, cut it out!"

"Yeah… you can stop playing games now… I know you like it…" He gave an upward nod.

"What the hell are you talking about! Crazy-ass…" Her cell phone rang. "Hold on - hello…? Oh, hey girl! Why didn't you call back?" As if forgetting what just happened, Tina had no trouble talking to the girl on the phone.

Jan Lee pulled over to Zack. "What the hell '_are_' you talking about?"

"Heh, heh… I'm getting some foot-on-pussy action under the table. She's probably trying her hardest to act normal. I like that. Turns me on."

"Yeah right, Tina wouldn't let you lay a finger on her for a second."

"I told you. I told you she wants me."

"Dude, she would have freaked out by now."

"That's what I was telling you earlier. She didn't resist at all."

"Tch, I don't believe a word you just said."

"Shit, I dare you to take a look. Go."

"You're serious, huh?" Jann Lee said reluctantly. He drew in closer to Zack and said in a low voice, "what does it feel like?"

"… Not what I expected, but hey, I've had all kinds of pussies…"

"Try to make her… you know…" He gestured.

They laughed together by the sheer funniness and high-fived each other.

"Hold on, I'll work my magic on her." He shut his eyes. "…She's gonna like this… Tell me when she acts up." He began making low grunts, his eyebrow twitching simultaneously.

Jan Lee waited several seconds for a reaction, but Tina continued on the phone effortlessly. "No. Not yet."

"Heh, she's pretty tough!" He pulled out his bottled water and began sipping. "I'll get her. What's she doing?"

"Still talking."

"Give me a few seconds…………………………"

"Zack-"

"Wait… almost done…" His grunting becoming more evident.

"Zack!"

"What! You're breaking my concentration!"

"I don't know what the hell you're trying to do, cause Tina's not here!"

"_Wha?_"

"She just got up and walked outside a few seconds ago!"

Zack opened his eyes to unfortunately see Tina's seat empty.

"CKKH! _Cough! Cough!_" He choked on his water. If his foot wasn't on Tina, his foot was currently on _someone's_ crotch. He quickly drew back his foot.

"You f-ing liar…" Jan Lee shook his head.

"Yeah, that's right I was lying!" Zack played along. "I got you there! Heh… Urk!" He put his hand over his mouth as if he were about to vomit, his cheeks flared, holding it in.

Jan Lee sneered and leaned back. "Sick dude! Not here! Go to the toilette!"

Zack clumsily left the table and rushed out trying to figure out where the restrooms were.


	17. Peeeeeeeeeeew

_Hello peoples! Well here's another wacky tale for ya; feel free to induldge yourself! Disclaimer: I do not own Dead or Alive!_

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Tina came back inside and sat down. "Where's he going? Got sick from all that dirty talk?"

"Who was that? Jan Lee asked.

"Huh?" She flipped her hair. "Oh, just one of my close girlfriends. She's a sports model."

"She sounds hot."

She looked at him jokingly at fluttered her eyes. "Not as hot as me sugar..." She began tucking herself into the chair laughed aloud as she reminisced about her conversation. "Hah! She was telling my about this hilarious story about how she got drunk last night at a party and slept with this really hot guy she was flirting with, but when she woke he was like so frikkin ugly. I mean BUTT UGLY. Like he was so ugly she just left without saying anything!" She chuckled and began wiping the tears off her eyes. "Jeez, my friend is such an idiot! I sure as hell wouldn't drink until I get stupid!"

Jan Lee scoffed. "I don't know…You guys seemed pretty cozy knocked out on the floor this morning."

"Who me? Oh, no. I wasn't the one out of it. I was just tired. That was Lei Fang." She paused. "…Yeah…Matter of fact? I think she got lucky last night – or was that Kasumi? Nah, pretty sure it was Lei Fang."

Jann Lee swallowed hard.

"What's the matter, you seemed surprised."

"Ah," Jann Lee choked, ignoring Tina's comment "so what – so what happened?"

"As if 'I'm' supposed to know! Why don't we ask her!"

Jann Lee shook his head hastily, but it was too late, Tina yelled from across the table, "Hey, Lei Fang. What ever happened between you and that hot German guy? One night stand, huh?" She nodded her head and shook her body in rocking motion, giving her thumbs up.

Everyone stopped their chatting and looked over at Lei Fang, who blushed pink. She didn't even want to think about the little 'incident' last night. It was embarrassing, yes. But it all became worth it when she realized it was a perfect time to make Jan Lee swimming in jealousy. Her embarrassed grin turned into a confident smile.

"Oh, yes." Helena added. "What happened to that handsome gentleman?" She placed her chin over her knuckles.

"Actually, he gave me the best night my life." She lied.

Tina leaned in. "Find out anything interesting about him? Like-"

"LIKE HOW BIG'S HIS SHLONG?" said Jann Lee aloud, bluntly.

Kasumi gasped, placing her fingers over her lips and giggling.

"Yah!" Tina said excitedly. "That's exactly what we wanted to know!"

"Um, well…" Lei Fang started…

"It was so cute," Tina explained to everyone, "she went off gallivanting and we didn't know where the heck she went! And the man was so sweet, he was calling her "Chinese Maiden', or something like that."

"Schones Madchen." Helena corrected.

"Yeah, whatever. So anyways, he was so hot all of us girls were practically drooling over him. And Lei Fang told us how she was going to do him and everything. Strap him up. Cuff him to the bed…" Tina unconsciously began exaggerating the story.

"Well… It wasn't…"

Tina continued talking. It took a couple of more times for Lei Fang to break in a few words.

"Tina, it didn't exactly work out that way."

"Excuse me?" Tina asked slightly irritated from being interrupted.

"I mean, something did happen, but it didn't." She tried manipulating the truth.

"Do what?" Tina scratched her head.

"You know…"

Tina slapped her hand on the table, now annoyed. "No, we don't know. What the hell are you talking about?"

"I didn't sleep with him, alright!"

Jann Lee silently gave out a long held-in sigh.

"What! Why wouldn't you?" Tina asked in disbelief. "I mean, the man was practically offering himself to you! He was gorgeous! How could you?"

Helena and Kasumi, also surprised began nodding their heads to Tina's rants.

Lei Fang didn't want to have to say this, but feeling under pressure she had to give out her reasons. "Because…"

"Why!" Tina, Helena, and Kasumi yelled in unison.

"Well I found this picture, and… he's Hitomi's boyfriend okay?!" she yelled exhasperated.

Peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew (Hayate's ego crashing)

"Um, Hayate-sama, are you alright?" Kasumi asked wearily.

Everyone turned to look at Hayate, who for some reason, had his eyes retracted into white circles and his mouth peculiarly formed into an upside-down triangle. They all screamed in shock.

"He's probably got a really bad cramp, I get that sometimes," Tina reasoned. "Just leave him alone so he won't go PMSing on us…He sure looks weird though," Tina laughed aloud.

"Okay…" answered Helena. She turned to Lei Fang. "Are you so sure? How do you know?"

"I was looking through his wallet and found a picture of them in each other's arms. I was so sure it was Hitomi, because it looked exactly like her - and she was even wearing that favorite pink headband of hers!"

A peeping noise came out of Hayate's mouth.

"Eeek!" Kasumi shrieked. She suspiciously scooted away from him.

"So Lei Fang," Jann Lee continued impatiently, not caring how unbelievably freaky Hayate was looking. "Do you have a pic of him?"

"Well actually, I got a great picture of us making out on my cell phone….But I want to delete it real bad. What if Hitomi gets her hand on it?"

"So. Where is it?" Tina asked.

Lei Fang reluctantly pulled it out of her purse and opened the picture, which had been taken downstairs on the dance floor of the Autobahn. Ayane Snatched the phone from Lei Fang and took a glance for herself.

"Dang you were all up on him."

Jann Lee grew restless. "Hurry up and pass that phone down."

Ayane rolled her eyes, "calm down!" She slid it to the end of the table where Jann Lee sat.

"...WTF? Hey, I think I know this guy…" He began scratching his chin.

"What are you talking about?" Tina asked. "We barely met em!"

"Guys, look at this guy and tell me he doesn't look familiar." He turned the phone around to give everyone a glimpse of the picture. No one could recall the face.

"What's that?" Zack asked walking from the bathroom. He tried acting as normal as possible after the secret footsie incident.

"Nothing. Lei Fang's secret mystery man." Jann Lee retorted.

"What? Not me? Let me see that!" He grabbed the phone to take a look. "Damn!" He couldn't help saying. "That man's one lucky bastard …wait a minute…" He drew closer to the picture. "Isn't that Hitomi's dad?"


End file.
